I Am Addiction

Chapter 2: Escaping Reality

I had fallen asleep after a while. I woke up when Vince tapped me on the leg. "We need to talk about something before we get there. We are about 30 minutes away" he said as he turned off the music that he had been listening to. "Okay, what do we need to talk about," I said curiously, "is it about Pixie?" "Not exactly," he said, "I wanted to warn you that there will be some drugs there. I use to do some things back when I lived here and my friends still fuck with some of it. Are you okay with that? I might wanna get high with them." I stayed silent for a moment. I knew he use to do stuff, but I wasn't sure what. I finally asked, "What kind of drugs?" He asked me if I knew what 'ice' was and I told him I hadn't heard of it. He told me that it was crystal (meth) and that there would also be coke and other drugs. He said he couldn't be sure of what they would be doing. "You would be doing all that," I asked, "isn't it dangerous?" He explained that meth and coke are just drugs that give you energy. He went on explaining the effects as if it wasn't a big deal. I wasn't really okay with it, but I didn't want to seem controlling or lame, so I said "I guess it's okay. As long as your safe." We pulled up before we could talk any more. We grabbed our bags and headed inside. The place was trashed but the house seemed like it use to look nice. When they answered the door I started getting nervous. We all introduced our selves, but I didn't see Pixie anywhere. I had Ruby show me to the bathroom. She had bright red hair, like a fire truck, and she was covered in tattoos. She looked like she hadn't eaten in weeks. We got to the bathroom and she began to walk back to the living room with everyone else. I walked in and seen Pixie. She was sitting on the toilet, but she wasn't using it. I quickly noticed a needle in her hand that she was sticking into her arm. I said I was sorry, but she stopped me and said to come in and shut the door. I was nervous but I did. She apologized for me having to see her using. I began to wonder if she even remembered how many times in the past she had done it in front of me without hesitation. She was acting like I'd never seen her use; like I hadn't held her hair back while she got sick, taken care of her and made sure she ate, and like she hadn't begged for and stolen money from me to supply her addiction. Once she finished, she stuggled to stand up while wobbling side to side but finally with my help got on her feet. She was unsteady and looked as if she might colapse but instead she threw her arms out almost hitting me. "I missed you Ana bear!" She use to always call me that when we were together. She hugged me as tight as she could with her weak arms while trying to hold herself up by leaning on me. I told her I missed her too and asked if she would let me use the bathroom for a moment. She agreed to and slipped out of the door to join everyone in the living room. The bathroom was full of needles, spoons, and straws that had been cut up for snorting. It was a terrifying sight. When I got out they had lines cut out on the table and Vince had a rolled up bill in his hand and was bent down to the table. He snorted a pretty big line and then looked up and seen me. "Mauriana! Come here and get a line!" He said as Ruby handed me a straw and pushed me towards the table. I panicked. I looked around at everyone starting at me. "Come on! Don't be lame! Just do it," Vince said laughing with his friends at me. I must have seemed so lame standing there frozen for a moment in hesitation because I seen Matt shake his head and laugh a little across the room as he whispered to Jack who didn't seem to care about what Matt was trying to say. I walked to the table almost tripping on a backpack in the floor and I sat on the couch.  I found the smallest line and bent down trying not to think about it too much. I had a hard time though, because I  stayed there, hovering over the line with the staw up to my face. I was afraid and Vince could tell. He came over and said, "Its an escape from reality. You can let go of all the pain and sadness and stress you've been dealing with and just be free. Try it. It's just crystal. It just brings you up, man. I promise it will be okay. I'm right here." I held my left nostril with my left middle finger and stuck the straw in my other nostril. I snorted it quickly and immediately felt a horrible aching burn in the side of my head and my eyes started watering from the pain in my nose. Everyone else did their lines right as I finished. I started to feel the biggest adrenaline rush in my stomach and I was surprised how much I loved it. I was wide awake and so happy. I told myself that I wouldn't get hooked and that it was a one time thing, but some how I knew in the back of my head that I was lying to myself. I wouldn't let myself believe it but I knew I was already addicted just from that one line and feeling that first high. I never knew how much chaos and misery would follow that night.

I am Addiction, you think you can control me? You're wrong. I'm the one who has control now. Consider me your new best friend. I'll be with you until your final breath.

**chapter 3 coming soon!