I Am Addiction

Before The Addiction: How Did I End Up Here?

I've always been a decently smart girl, although if you were to do a background check to confirm that statement, my grades would make it seem otherwise. I assume that's mostly due to my lack of attendance to school since about 4th grade. Let me make one thing clear; I wasn't skipping, even if I did prefer not to be there. My health problems caused most of it. I have dealt with my bad health since I was just a child. Unfortunately, some of my medical problems caused me to gain weight from a young age and this caused bullying at school and even at home at times. This along with other things pushed me into my depression. As you could imagine, I was pretty insecure and I even started puttin myself down after a while. I've been sent to mental hospitals full of sadness and anger, I've taken their prescriptions filled with false hope, I've talked to their therapists who promised progress, and none of it ever seemed to do much of anything. Don't get me wrong, I know I could have cut some things and even people out of my life to decrease my stress and emotional trauma, but I just couldn't bring myself to do this most of the time. Like Vince, for example, whom I have been on and off with since I was 12 years old. We have even broken up at times for over a year, then, as always, we get back together. We always run into problems and it never ends well, but we truly do love each other. I had my "partying phase" fairly young, and during that time, while Vince and I were broken up, I dated Rob whom ended up causing my first minor addiction. We both got bad on pills for a while and then became worse when his mother died. My own mother had always been physically and verbally abusive, so Rob's mom treated me like her own. She was the closest thing I had to a real mom, so her death took a huge tole on me. Once Rob and I ended things, I worked hard and got clean. I tend to make bad choices, but I always do my best to fix what I can. I slipped up and took a Xanax a few times, but I think that's good enough considering how much I improved. Soon after, I ended up with Vince, yet again. Shortly after we got back together, he did something quite similar to what Rob had done, but much worse. It wasn't pills this time, and it would tear my whole life apart. Nothing good happens in GreenWood.

****chapter 1: the drive to greenwood-- coming soon!(: [its already written, I just have to put it on here]

Thanks for reading!❤️