One-Shorts

Realistic Dreams (Oliver Sykes)

I regret waking up this morning, I regret not turning back, I regret not asking her to stay, and I regret not telling her I love her. I’m hours away from leaving my apartment to get on the next flight to America with my band to start Warped Tour, for the next three months I won’t be with her I’ll be alone regretting all the things I should have done and said to her. She has no idea I feel this way but what I am supposed to do we are both two different people, she’s a writer and wouldn’t understand the job I have we aren’t together but we have this mutual thing between us. She’s always been there for me through everything and I owe her that, she’s stayed by my side this whole time and I told her to leave I pushed her away because I thought she wouldn’t understand and I still think that but I regret not talking to her about it. She’s a one of a kind type of girl and I know she loves me, but this is probably the best for the both of us by now, three years of just being whatever we have been has got to stop before one of us ends up getting hurt, but the look on her face when I told her she had to leave was just the worse, I remember the conversation so clearly even after so many drinks.

“Oliver? What’s wrong?” She asked me as she turned to look at me in my arms, we were watching a movie on my couch just passing time by, just enjoying each other’s company’ she had no idea I was leaving the next morning because I never told her.

“Nothing, love let’s just finish the movie” I sighed, I was thinking of her; of how much I loved her and I never took the chance to tell her and ask her to be mine after all these years of being in the mutual relationship I never made it official.

“No, tell me what’s wrong. You always change the subject when I ask” She sighed getting frustrated with me, her words were harsh but true; I never told her what was wrong, she knew I was in a band she never said anything about it; she would ask about it a few times when I was touring but other than that she acted like it wasn’t a problem for us but to me it was a big problem because I was always away from her.

“Sierra, we need to talk” I sighed as I rubbed my face with my free hand, as the other rubbed the side of her arm gently. She sat up in her spot, and pushed my arm off her; her face just expressionless it broke my heart.

“Well go on, I don’t have all day Oliver.” She sounded angry, like she already knew what I was going to say. She probably did know, she knows me better than anyone does.

“Sierra, I don’t think-“ I stopped myself knowing exactly what she was going to do, she got up from sitting next to me and grabbed her jacket.

“Oliver, I don’t understand you sometimes. We aren’t even together and you’re making this harder than it really is, if you don’t want me around anymore you could have just told me.” She didn’t turn to face me; she just walked right out the door without another word.

“No, Sierra wait-“ I barely called out to her before she closed the door softly. She wasn’t angry at me, she was hurt and upset and it’s all my fault I should have never said anything; I don’t want her to leave, I want her to stay I want her to be mine but I fucked it all up.

I heard a knock on my apartment door knowing full well it was either Krissy or Jordan, most likely both considering Krissy was going to be our photographer for Warped Tour, and Jordan said he would come by early to help get some equipment ready; but if it was just Krissy I was going to get an ear-full, Sierra and her are close friends they have a place together and basically never leave each other’s side sometimes.

“Oli, how are you this morning? You look pretty hung-over” Jordan said as he walked into my apartment after I opened the door, I looked out real fast thinking Krissy wasn’t there but just as I was about to close the door she burst in being all loud. So much for having a quiet morning, my headache is just about to get much worse than it originally was before.