30 Ways To Fall In Love

Part 4

1 month later...

This was going to be the first time I'd left my apartment in a month. I slung my grey and blue flowery hype rucksack onto my back and quickly scooped up my notepad. I then proceeded to rummage through my cupboards but my search came up empty. Sighing, I turned to Adam, my roommate's cupboard. Finding a cereal bar, I took it from the shelf, carefully arranging the rest of the items to hide the gap left by the absent snack, before swiping my keys from the counter and leaving my dorm.

Since the incident in the hospital I hadn't bothered to do anything, even though I vowed I would put in effort for school. I hadn't answered calls, hadn't shaved, hadn't even made any food! I ate pizza every night for a whole month. I guess the thing was I felt.. useless, like I didn't have a purpose anymore now that my whole world had left me, leaving my life flipped upside down.

While locking up my front door, I waved to James my neighbour, who sent me a small smile back, quickly returning his attention to his phone. Sugar! My phone! I swiftly unlocked the door and rushed inside, pulling my phone off charge. As the lock screen opened I looked to see how much charge I had. 50%. Well I guess I'm not using my phone today. I also checked the time. 8:30. Groaning I sped down the corridor to the lift, pressing the down button repeatedly even though I knew it wouldn't speed it up. As the doors pinged open I jumped inside. I couldn't believe that it was my first day back in lessons and I was already late!

***

"So she just doesn't remember you?". Matt stared at me with disbelief, his mouth gaping open as I shook my head slowly, looking down at my lap and fiddling with the hem of my well-worn favourite grey t-shirt.

"She just seemed like a different person you know," I said, my voice cracking slightly. Jade reached over and began to run her hand up and down my bicep. It was surprisingly comforting for such a small gesture. I guess when you know someone for so long they know exactly what to do to make you feel better. Maya used to do things like that too, specifically always knowing when I needed one of her magical hugs. You just can't get her out of your head can you? It was true, for a good month I had thought about her non-stop, desperately looking for some sort of salvation. But in the end, not all clouds have a silver lining.

"Her expression was just different, she wasn't looking at me like she normally does. When I held her hand she tensed up and she just looked confused. I mean how did that happen? She remembered her mum for Christ sake why didn't she remember me?" I cried out on the verge of tears, throwing down my fists on the table before hissing due to the pain it caused my shoulder. I didn't have to use the sling anymore but I was still in some serious discomfort.

Sighing and suddenly exhausted by my outburst, I sunk back in my chair and dragged my hands down my face in an attempt free myself from the deep frown lines which recently had become a permanent fixture.

Matt and Jade just picked absentmindedly at their food, exchanging worried and shocked glances between eachother. A silent conversation. They were obviously just as baffled as I was. 

"I just don't know what to think you know?" I mumbled while looking around the nearly empty lunch hall. Matt, Jade and I had been sat discussing Maya for so long that we had failed to notice the rest of the students filing out to go to last period.

"Anyway we might want to go," Matt stated, stealing the words right out my mouth.

We all hurriedly packed away our lunch things before we went our separate ways to class. Before I could turn to head for chemistry I felt a gentle hand on my good shoulder. I turned to see a solemn faced Jade looking up at me from under her heavy lashes. "It will be okay you know," she said, a ghost of a smile lingering on her lips. I returned the smile halfheartedly.