Boys

Chapter 4. Dishonest Truth

For the rest of the day classes seemed to go on as they usually did despite us having no other lessons for the remainder of the year. That was probably why I couldn't focus on anything throughout the day, because there was nothing really to distract me from my thoughts. We did do things during our classes, but a majority of our activities included movies, or idle reading. All classes were like that except for homeroom with Miss Amakata. 

"In celebration of the end of the year, the end of final exams and the upcoming Summer Fest we will be making paper lanterns to release into the ocean. Now I want all of you to draw or even write what is important about you and make sure it is appropriate, because you will be sharing these within the last thirty minutes of class," she explained smiling softly.

I looked down at the paper shell on my desk and thought about a design glancing up to see Haru a few seats in front of me staring out his window without much of a care for the project we were given. -Maybe he's still caught up on the career worksheet... Didn't he come to the conclusion last week after his trip with Rin he that he wanted to be a swimmer?- I asked myself sighing softly at the thought.

"Haru... You really should start working on the lantern. It'll get your mind off of everything and maybe even calm your nerves."

Haru glanced over at his best friend with bored sapphire eyes and scoffed turning back towards the window to watch the birds take flight. Makoto sighed softly at the disregard of the raven haired male and returned his attention back to his project smiling as he drew out simple stick figures of his friends and family onto the paper. I smiled softly being reminded of a preschooler who was learning how to draw and looked back at my own blank shell wondering what I could do for mine.

"You know what they say Natalie. Art is the best way for you to express yourself."

A soft gasp of shock left my lips as I jumped in my chair at the sound of Nikki's voice next my ear. I turned once the surprise dissipated and looked at her with a soft, yet annoyed, glare.

"Don't scare me like that Nicole!"

"Oh stop being such a baby... Seriously. I've seen some of your work Natalie. You have the talent to express what you wish you could explain with words. All you have to do is use your artistic skill."

I bit my lip softly and looked back at the blank canvas sitting in front of me begging to be covered in something amazing. I thought for what felt like hours until a smile spread across my cheeks with the nod of my head. She was right. The truest form of expressing my inner self was going to be through art, and it was true that I loved to create things. I grinned at myself picking up my freshly sharpened pencil and began sketching out a simple dragon that would eventually wind towards a yin yang symbol. Then I began to sketch out the outlines of a snake coiling through the symbol baring its' fangs and then the outline of a bangle tiger clawing desperately at the symbols cracking center trying to hold it all together.

"That's a very interesting design Natalie..." Miss Amakata noted.

"Thank you Ma'am."

"You have a very unique talent dear. I can't wait to hear about its' importance."

"I'm excited to share it with everyone Miss Amakata," I said smiling softly at her before going back to working on my lantern shell. This was by far my best work yet and I hope everyone else will be able to understand my meaning.

***

Some time after that brief encounter I had set my pencil down and looked around to see that everyone else was pretty much done with their lantern shells at this point. My gaze returned to the paper and a huge grin split my cheeks. I was just so proud of my work this time around, and when Nikki's face lit up upon seeing the image I felt even more accomplished than ever before.

"Alright class! It looks like we are all ready to present our projects. So I would like each and every one of you to share the meaning behind your drawings with the rest of us. It will be good for us to know what is being sent out across the ocean and why it is important to you... With that said who would like to go first?" she asked looking around the room before her eyes landed on one student in particular. "Haruka Nanase will you start us off please?"

The black haired male looked up from the window with wide ocean blue eyes and he sort of reminded me of a deer caught in head lights. Although, I wasn't sure if he was just confused about the instructions or scared to go up in front of the class, but watching him stand up from his desk and go up to the front podium I figured it was the later. He sighed shakily trying to calm his now raging nerves and held up his lantern shell for all of us to see.

"Wonderful work Haruka-Kun," Miss Amakata praised.

"Thank you Amakata-Sensei..."

"Will you please explain your... Interesting drawings to the class?"

"Well I drew the Iwatobi mascot simply because I just... Like it... I drew the dolphin in part because Natalie and Nicole tell me I remind them of a dolphin and also because the animal represents freedom... And the four birds in flight... Are my friends... Makoto... Rei... Nagisa... And Rin..."

Before he allowed Miss Amakata to say anything he had quickly returned to his desk and sat down. A frown dusted across my cheeks as he looked down at his desk in embarrassment listening to the confused claps and snarky whispers. I growled having enough of the crap and slammed my palms down onto my desk to quiet the class.

"I'm next," I hissed walking over to the podium. "So the pictures on my lantern shell represent me as a person. The dragon, for instance, is the illusion of common day freedom. The yin yang symbol in front of it is pretty much my self balance. The snake that is coiling through the symbol represents my best friend, Nicole, and the tiger clawing at the breaking center represents my older brother, D'Shawn."

"Why didn't you draw something a little more beautiful?" a girl asked looking at the shell with distaste.

"Because art is a pure form of showing who you are, and like Haruka's lantern indicates that he is a free spirit mine represents..." I trailed of slowly not sure of what to say. -Inner turmoil... The want to be myself... My lack of control and balance...- I thought firing off each possible meaning. "Mine represents my want and need for balance."

A else could I offer accept a dishonest truth?