My Sweetest Downfall

Chapter 9

It has been two months since Caleb and I last spoke... specifically the night I destroyed everything. Caleb told me I had to fix myself, that I need to start it. And to be honest, after that fateful incident, I have made up my mind on doing what was best for me. I wanted to fix myself. Caleb was right.

I've held my part of the deal. Eversince that night, I've been trying my best to heal myself. I know only I could start it. I've been trying to fix myself for the past eight weeks, but it definitely has not been, in any way, easy. Memories of Ansel and I would stream across my mind every now and then. But, somehow, it's not as painful as before, anymore. The pain, one day, just stopped.

In a way, I have finally taken a real step forward. The only remaining reason that these eight weeks has been dreadful was because of one person.

Thursday, noon. Ivan and Laura were surprisingly not present. It felt traitorous, but it was not enough for me to hate them forever. I just let it slip by.

I was lurking around the halls when I suddenly felt a pair of hands grab my shoulders from behind. I was being dragged so hurriedly I did not have enough time to see who it was. Before I even knew it, I was already thrown inside the empty music room.

"Ivan?" I said as I turned around to face him.

I could hear his breath shaking. He put his hands on his pockets; face sweating, and he looked hesitant.

"Ivan, what the hell--..."

"I need to talk to you," he slightly rose his hand, as if telling me to stop talking.

Crossing my arms as I shrugged, I responded "Okay. About what?"

Ivan bit his lips as his eyes roamed around the room. I could see that he was too nervous to even blurt out a single word.

I frowned in confusion, "Ivan, what is it?"

He scratched the back of his head, unable to keep himself steady, "We, uhh... It's... Well..."

I leaned in slightly closer, awaiting for an answer from Ivan.

He bit his lip, and took a deep breath.

"... I slept with Laura."

I stood frozen in my position, unable to blink for a few seconds.

"Ohhh. Well... what's so bad about that?"

Ivan looked at me completely confused.

"Yeah, I mean seriously, Ivan. We've been doing that since freshman year, sometimes we three even sleep in the floor together during sleepover--..."

"No, Scarlet. It's not like that."

I gave him a dead-cold stare, fluttering my eyes as I try to let him explain further and confirm if what I first thought was true.

"Laura and I had sex."

This time, I could not stop my jaw from dropping. I stood there frozen. I could not believe what I was hearing.

"W-wow... " I tried chuckling but it came out so stiff from the complete state of shock I had gained from what Ivan said.

"C'mon, at least say something, Scarlet!"

"I-I'm juuuust... completely surprised from what I heard... especiallyifthosewordscameoutfromsomeonewhoIknewwasgay," I said the last line so fast that I did not even bother to stop.

"Yeah, I'm..." Ivan bowed his head, scratching the sides of his hair, "... I'm pretty shocked from it, too."

"Can... can I ask how it happened?" I said hesitantly, but the curiosity in my voice destroyed the mood.