Brothers

Chapter 12-Surgery

[EDITED]

::Jason McCann::

"So. Let's get down to business. What's gonna happen?" My mom asked the doctor. We were currently sitting in his office. It has been 2 days since the incident. Dr Kindheart just wanted to take a few more tests before telling my mom and I the news.

"If not treated right away. He may die." The doctor said. I felt Justin cringe by my side. Ass hole doesn't know how to sugar coat shit. Thank god he's being released today. I don't think I can handle him around with doctors.

I grabbed Justin's hand and gave it a reassuring squeeze. "Is it to late?" I asked. He looked over at Justin intently. He grabbed a paper and a pen and scribbled some stuff down.

"It's hard to tell. Well have you been having headaches that gradually become more frequent and more severe? Unexplained nausea or vomiting? Vision problems, such as blurred vision, double vision or loss of peripheral vision? Gradual loss of sensation or movement in an arm or a leg? Difficulty with balance? Speech difficulties? Confusion in everyday matters? Personality or behavior changes?" The doctor named many symptoms. Justin nodded. I've read these symptoms before and I've also seem Justin go through some of them. He does have a brain tumor.

"I have all those symptoms besides the vision problems and the gradual loss of sensation." He told the doctor. The doctor nodded and wrote it down on his notebook. He looked through a few more papers and scribbled some more stuff down and then looked back up at us.

"Well you're not on the final stage that can get you killed. But you do need a surgery before it gets to late." I cringed at that. Surgery? I hate surgeries. Is there a phobia against surgeries? I hate stuff that has anything to do with doctors, needles, surgeries, etc they give me the creep and I feel lightheaded just thinking about it.

I hate surgeries. Fucking hell. Nobody knows for sure if you'll come back. "If it's fine with you. I'd like to make you an appointment for tomorrow afternoon for the surgery." He looked over at my mom. Too soon.

"Yes we'll be here." She smiled over at him. Justin? Surgery? I can't fucking do this! Why can't they give him a pill or something. Anything! I got up and walked out of the doctors office. The room was starting to spin and get smaller.

I can't. How can I let my brother go into surgery? I know he may die if he doesn't but he may die if he does to. It's a 50% chance he'll die and a 50% chance he'll survive. I can't take that risk. Well I'm going to have to aren't i? I said I was willing to do anything for Justin to survive but you don't understand the fear I have against surgeries.

I can't loose my brother this way. I pulled at the ends of what's left of my hair while walking down a hall and walked down the corridor and laid against the wall. I've been hiding my hair under a beanie.

No. I've lost my brother before. I can't loose him again! I lost Justin for 2 whole weeks. He was in a coma. That's the whole fucking reason he never remembered Derek. His foot did get wrapped around a sea weed but in that sea weed was a jelly fish.

It stung his foot. By the time we got to the hospital the poison already moved. It was a miracle he woke up from the coma. I was fucking terrified. When he didn't remember anything we all decided to not tell him about the incident or about Derek. Scared he would've got traumatized or something.

I slid down the wall still pulling at what's left of my hair. Justin can't die. that's not suppose to happen! I was suppose to take care of him. I'm the big brother. I felt some tears slip down but I didn't bother wiping them. I felt like I failed him.

"Jason?" I heard a small voice. I felt a hand go on my shoulder. "Hey Jase. Everything's gonna be fine." He assured me. You see! He's taking care of me when I'm the one who should be assuring him. Not the other way around. I'm such a horrible older brother.

"You don't know that." I croaked out. It's true he doesn't.

"Jase look at me." He said. I slowly turned my head towards him. "I'm gonna be fine. Now come on. The doctor wanted to speak to you." I gulped. I'm fucking scared shitless to talk to fucking doctors. After all the fucking bad news they've been telling me. Justin helped me up and we walked back down the corridor.

"Jason. I have some news that may interest you." He said as we walked in. "In your last visit when we took those tests. We've studied your results very carefully. What my team and I have gotten into agreement is that, you can have a surgery to remove the cancer. It's not to the point where you can die. But if you don't do this surgery you may die." He said.

I felt a little light head. What the fuck. So if I don't do the surgery I'll die. If I go into surgery there's a 50-50% chances I'll make it out alive. Holy shit. I can't. I shook my head violently and ran out of the room. You don't fucking understand how I feel when I even think of surgeries. You know that feeling you get when you see a spider? Or when somebody tells you to talk to your crush? Or when you have to ride the elevator on your own? Basically when you have to face your own fear? Well thats how I feel right now. It's nerve wracking.

Not looking back. I ran down the stairs because I'm not gonna wait for the stupid elevator. I walked into one of the restrooms and washed my face. I looked up at my reflection. It looked pale and horrible. It looked like I haven't slept for days when in reality I've slept.

I had bags under my eyes and my hair looked thinner. Probably about 65% of my hair has fallen off. I took the beanie that was in my back pocket and put it on. I should just shave off my hair.

"Jason?" I heard someone call. I turned around and met Justin's golden brown eyes. How did he find me? This hospital is huge. Or am I that easy to find?

"Yeah?" I scratched the back of my neck awkwardly.

"You okay?" He asked. I nodded. "Jason I know you hate surgeries but you need it." He said softly.

"I-I can't Justin." I mumbled out.

"Do it for me?" He asked. I shook my head. "Jase please do it-" he cut himself off with a hiss.

"Justin." He was groaning and hissing in pain grabbing onto his head.

He fell onto his knees and kept holding onto it. "Jay. Wait here." I ran out of the restroom and called the closest doctor I saw. "Dr! Call Dr. Kindheart. I need him!" I yelled. He nodded quickly and called onto the p.a.

Seconds later the doctor rushed in. "Where is he?" He asked.

"Restroom." I lead him the way.

"Justin. I'm gonna need you to calm down." He said calmly. But with the pain Justin is experiencing right now

That ain't gonna happen. "I'm gonna need to take him into surgery right now." He helped Justin up and called on some nurses to bring a gurney.

"Wait." I called the doctor before he left. "I'll take my surgery now too."