Chapter 8

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"You look hot," Veronica exclaimed. "You have to buy it."

"I feel... Promiscuous," I responded, examining myself in the mirror.

Veronica had offered to buy me some clothes for the party, an offer that I was very grateful for. She had me try on a tight black crop top, but truthfully it didn't feel like me. It hugged my every ridge and curve (the few that I had), and I felt exposed in a way that didn't make me feel liberated or sexy.

"You mean sexy," Veronica said with a sly smile.

"I'm sorry, I just don't like it," I said, already closing the door to the changing room.

"Well I don't want to force you, but it's a shame."

I changed back into my regular clothes and returned the crop top, feeling defeated. Veronica and I went to do some more browsing, splitting up a bit. She went to the shorts aisle, and I went to the sweaters just because those are what I like.

"High waisted?" I heard Veronica say, to which I turned around to see her holding up a pair of dark denim high waisted shorts with three buttons, and surprisingly, didn't look that short. I gazed at it, then knowingly she smiled at me triumphantly.

I went back to campus satisfied. Veronica bought the high waisted shorts, along with a loose violet crop top that would hang off the shoulder matched which would look amazing with my white docs. It was something new, yet still something that felt like me. I felt cute, comfortable, and even a little sexy.

The rest of the week flew by, and the night of the party finally came around. I did my makeup boldly with smoky eyes and wine-colored matte lipstick. I made sure I smelled like flowers, and that my hair was neatly messy. It sounded like quite the contradiction, but in the moment it made sense to me and that was the best way to think about a hairstyle for a party. Even though initially I would have had no intention of going to a college party, I then felt oddly excited and even looked forward to it.

Veronica ended up also wearing jean shorts, but with a grey and blue striped short sleeve crop top that exposed her toned abdomen. Her platinum hair was pulled up into a high ponytail, and her makeup was also bold but with a light red tint on her lips. Needless to say, we both killed it.

Not surprisingly, the party was hosted at a frat house. We could hear the pulsating music from down the block, (we walked to the party) and already heard shouts from who knew what. My heart began to beat faster and I felt a sense of uneasiness in my stomach. I got so caught up in finding cute clothes and spending time with Veronica that I forgot that this in fact was a college party, and things could get wild.

"Hey, so are you fine with me having to leave you for a bit? Not right now though," Veronica said after us walking for a bit in silence.

"Yeah of course," I lied. "Do whatever you need to do."

She exhaled as if holding a breath from my response. "Thanks Callie. I'll try not to be gone too long."

We walked across the lawn of the frat house, which already had some students occupying it but none seemed drunk yet. That would probably change by the end of the night. We walked inside, and the smell of cheap beer and sweat assaulted my nose, reminding me of why I never went to parties in high school. It was stifling and made me feel suffocated, even though I hadn't been bombarded with bodies yet. The sight in front of me was something of what I expected- People my age either getting wasted, currently being wasted, and intimate dancing.

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