life & death | jack wilder ✓

II

II

"the closer you look,
the less you see."

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"-AND THAT IS WHY DEATH is my worst fear." I finished, feeling empty inside. "Along with needles."

Jack sat beside me with a poker face. He was speechless throughout my rant but listened. He placed an arm around me.

"I used to think that I am challenging Death. I would do crazy things that could nearly cost my life." His dark brown eyes looked into mine. "I was a bit of a daredevil." He chuckled. "As I grew older and older, I began doing crazier things until--" he looked down. "until I learned the consequences. Actually, I experienced it. A near death experience." His voice broke.

"What happened?" I asked softly.

"I was about 16. 17? My friend dared me to do this thing, which was trending world-wide at that current time." He took a deep breath. "Ride on a motorcycle, blind folded, up to 120km/h for 2 minutes. As a stupid 16 year old, I did it. It seemed cool but it actually isn't. I regreted doing it. It changed my life. We chose a straight road going up the mountain just outside the city. It was always clear. No trucks, cars. I stole a BMW motorcycle at a pub and used it. It went fine during the first few seconds. It happened just after a minute. I heard shoutings. I was confused and had no idea what was happening. Just as I was about to pressed the break. I felt myself getting hit by something hard that was running fast and then I collapsed." He explained, still keeping his head down and a broken voice.

"What I'm going to tell you next is.." he struggled with his words. "-actually depends on you. Whether you believe it or not." He looked back into my eyes.

Now I realized there was a little green in his brown eyes. I was too busy looking into his eyes that I didn't notice that Jack was starting to lean forward.

Oh shit. I thought.

"Of course!" I yelled out. Jack seemed startled and cleared his throat as he returned back to his position before. My cheeks were flushed with embarrassment.

"Of course I believe you." I muttered, not surprised if he couldn't hear me.

He smiled sheepishly.

"When I was in coma, I heard voices. Weeping of people. The urge of waking up forced myself to fight. And that's when I learned something."

I remained silent, looking at him as he gazed at the empty space in front of us.

"I woke up a week after ths incident. I'd lost pieces of memory from the past and broke almost every single bone in my body. I was wrapped in plaster from head to toe." He sighed.

"You know what made me wake up?" He now stared into my eyes.

I shook my head slowly.

"Because the fear of death is what keeps me alive."

We remained in silence. I was stunned by what he said. I've never thought of it that way. Jack's eyes were starting to water. He quickly broke eye contact with me.

"Does Danny always take this long to read?" Merritt asked, breaking the silence around us. He must be listening to our conversation.

"I'm sure he'll come out soon." Jack replied, quietly.