It's Only Because I Love You (J.M) [COMPLETE]

chapter 24

J A C K

It's officially a month until this baby is due! It's also exactly a month until my birthday. We're hoping to have a nice night in and spend time with the guys. It's hard to do very much now since Lauren's pregnant. I can't leave her on her own and go out. If she goes into labour while I'm out and I can't hear my phone ringing then I will be officially the worst boyfriend ever!

L A U R E N

Me and Jack were sat talking about birthday plans. We called Conor in to ask him if he wanted a cake and he joined our conversation. About 5 minutes after he joined us, there was a knock at the door. Conor went to get it.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" We heard Conor shout.
"Yeah well if you wanna tell her something, say it yourself!" He's shouting again.
"Well yeah you can come in just don't expect to be allowed to stay for long." I heard the door slam shut and edged closer to Jack. He pulled me into him and my breathing started to quicken.

I watched as Conor walked into the room, Josh following behind him. My breath was speeding up rapidly. I started to get the pins and needles that always appear when this happens. And this is how I know I'm having a panic attack! I've not had one since Josh left and now he's back, they're back! I shut my eyes and try to breathe but it isn't working.

"Lauren! Lauren! Conor get her some water!" I could feel Jack holding tightly onto me.
"Just follow my breaths okay, in... And out... In... And out..." I went along with him, slowly getting my breathing back to normal. I felt Conor hand me the water and I couldn't reach up to grab it. Jack took it and brought it up to my mouth, tilting it so the water could get in. My mouth wasn't so dry now and I felt better instantly.

I was okay now. We were just sat there in silence.
"Why are you here?" I asked.
"Because of the baby." So he will want to see it.
"How is he? Staying well? All healthy?" Josh only just now cares about this baby. The baby that could potentially be his!
"He's doing good thanks. I can't wait to get him out though but he's good!" We were starting small talk.

"I just wanted to say, if he is mine... I want to have everything to do with him. I want him at least half the week. Only if it's okay of course but I want to be there for him."
"That's fine. Except that won't happen for a little while because i'm breast feeding. He needs to be with me at all times. You can visit each day of course. But not for very long. Just like today. You're going to get up and leave once you've finished what you're here to say."
"Well I guess that's my cue to go then. Bye." He stood up and walked out the door. Jack pulled me into an extra big hug.

I feel very on edge after the visit. I remember I used to have panic attacks fairly often when I was with Josh. Yes he knew how to stop them which was good but I didn't like them. Since he left I've had none. Although I haven't had any, Jack still knows how to stop them. It's funny that as soon as he comes back, I have one again. Very strange.

~

We finally got into bed after a long day. I felt Jack wrap his warm arms around my waist. He started to rub my stomach soothingly and before I knew it, I was asleep.

(Ugh another chapter and no a/n)