Therapy Session Poetry Series

Therapy Session 4

"Anything new happening? Summer plans?"

Yes...actually I'm meeting my dad for the first time...

"How are you feeling about that?"

I'm insanely nervous! We've never spoke a word to each other,

but now I'm attending his wedding this weekend.

I'll be meeting my sister, aunts, uncles, grandparents, and his wife's family...

I added him on Facebook a week or so ago and we don't really talk.

"Is this something you think will better your life?"

Yes? Maybe? I really want it to...

I want to meet them and finally feel like I have a family..

"You do have a family. Your mom, your brother, a few cousins. Do you not consider them family?"

I do, but I also want more. My whole life revolved around my mom and brother

and the occasional visit with my cousins, who are only related by marriage mostly.

I always had this whole second half of me missing that I wanted to find.

So far my dad and his family seem like they actually care and want to know me.

It feels nice, but I'm worried they'll hold my mom and her actions against me.

"What happened with your mom?"

A lot of problems between her and my dad and his family.

A lot of disbelief and bitterness.

My dad is not a perfect man but my mom is definitely not perfect either.

I'll also be meeting my fiance's family on his dad's side as well.

We're going to visit them on the 4th of July and we're going camping on the 8th.

"Are you excited about that?"

Honestly I'm less nervous about meeting them and just excited and impatient mostly...

"Why?"

I can just tell from what David says and how the family of his that i've met are...

that they'll like me and it puts me at ease knowing they're laid back and kind.

I've been dying to meet his aunts and uncles and cousins for so long.

It helps that David tells me about how much his dad would have loved me.

"Do you feel like your mood is improving?"

Only slightly but I have bad days....

Heat and I don't mix, and when I get hot or hungry I get very mean.

I've also been having really bad back problems and it's making me upset.

I'm kind of stressed to be honest, there's a lot of pressure on me right now.

"What kind of pressure?"

To get a good job to support David and I since he's disabled and can't work.

Meeting my dad, and David's family, and just trying to make money.

This has been an especially busy summer for me.

"You are handling it well from what I can tell. I hope everything goes well for you. I look forward to hearing about how it all goes. I will see you again next time."