The List

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That morning, a few hours later, I wake up against the wall, watching Henry. I stand up and walk outside, where Alison is feeding the children at the Pizza Shack. I find Ida and sit next to her in her booth.
    "Ida, do you know if Henry had any medical conditions?"
Ida looks at me, her hazel eyes glinting.
    "I don't think so," she says. "Is something wrong with Henny?"
I stand up.
    "Not really, he's just a little sick is all. Thank you for your help, Ida."
I wake up Henry and take his temperature again. 108. He coughs up a whole mouthful of blood a few minutes later, and I have to force-feed him water. I wake Otis, who is still asleep, sitting against the wall in Henry's room.
    "It's getting worse," I say. He looks at me, worry tinting his eyes. I pull him up and send him to get water and fever medicine.
    "I'm going to get Alison, Payton and Scarlett."
I find the other little ones playing with Astrid and Scarlett. I nod to Scarlett urgently, and motion towards the Pizza Shack. She excuses herself and follows me. I grab Payton from his easel, and pull Alison from behind the Pizza Shack counter.
    "Henry's sick. Extremely sick. I don't think-"
I stop, not able to say it. I look around, and they seem to get it anyway.
    "Anyway, Scarlett, I need you to keep the little ones occupied."
Scarlett nods gravely.
    "Shouldn't be hard," and strides to where they're playing with Astrid, putting on a forced smile when she reaches the children.
    "Alison, can you make Henry some breakfast? Something soft, like..."
    "Oatmeal."
I smile slightly at her, glad that she's finally decided to help.
    "Perfect."
Payton looks at me as Alison walks off.
    "Payton, can you try to find something to help his lungs? Medicine, you know. He's... coughing up blood, you know, and I'm worried."
Payton nods and rushes off to the pharmacy department to look for medicine. I run back to Henry's little room and kneel next to Otis.
    "Is he doing any better?"
Otis shakes his head, stroking Henry's little forehead, tears in his eyes.
    "How can it get this bad in two days?"
I shrug.
    "It's my fault. I didn't get him his medicine. I'm so sorry..."
    "It's not your fault. I didn't know it was this bad. If I had known, I would've gotten the medicine myself. I was occupied with other stuff and I just forgot. I-"
    "Don't blame yourself for things that aren't your fault."
    "Same to you."
I shrug, looking at the green plastic shower curtain just as Alison walks in with a warm bowl of oatmeal. Henry refuses to eat it, and I have to force it down his throat. The little one's are allowed one visit, for about ten minutes, until he starts coughing again and I have to force them to leave. I spend all day sitting next to him, and don't get much sleep that night either.
The next morning, I rub his little red head. Ida pushes her way through the curtain and runs to Henry. She just missed a coughing fit, but she obviously heard it. I wipe the blood off his chin and feed him more water. Ida cuddles up next to him, tears slipping down her cheeks and hugging him close. She looks at me.
"He's going to die, isn't he?"
My heart drops.
    "I don't know, Ida. I hope not."
She hugs him tightly and looks at him.
    "I love you, Henny."
Henry opens his eyes a little.
    "I love you too Idi."
I bite my lip and back up until I'm touching the wall. I sit against it, hugging my knees. After about ten minutes, I sit back over onto my knees.
    "I think he should sleep, Ida. I'm so sorry."
I want to sugarcoat it. I want to tell her that everything is going to be okay, that Henry is going to get better, that no one else is going to die. But I can't. I just can't force myself to think like that. Right now, I'm focused on keeping as many people alive as I can. I'm focusing on survival, and I can't think unrealistically. Even if it means some children will have to face the truth, it might save some lives. Then again, it might not.
    About an hour later, Otis comes into the room with a bottle of water. I pick myself up from my watching spot and kneel next to Henry.
    "Common, Henry, open up."
Henry opens his eyes into small, watery slits, mumbles "tired" under his breath, and closes his eyes again.
    "Henry, common Henry, wake up."
Nothing.
    "Henry, wake up."
Nothing. I look at Otis, who is staring at me with wide eyes.
    "Henry? Henry!"
I hold him by his little shoulders and shake him softly, growing harder as I get no reaction.
    "Henry! Henry wake up!"
    "Lily," I hear Otis behind me. No. Henry can't be dead. The little boy who was just running around happily a few days ago? No.
    "Henry!"
Otis grabs me underneath the arms and drags me away from the little boy. I collapse on the ground, not even crying, just staring at the little redheaded body on the mattress, tears welling in my eyes. I look up just in time to see a tear slide down Otis's cheek. He collapses next to me and I wrap him in a hug. We sit there for a very long time, crying to each other. I miss the old times more than ever. I miss sitting in class and having foot wars underneath the tables and talking at recess. I miss having normal conversations about schoolwork and gossip and rumors, although I hated them, I miss them more than ever. I'm like a guitar, and every time someone dies, a string snaps in my heart. And although you can replace it, you can never fix it.
    After the little ones say goodbye to Henry in a fit of tears and tantrums, we wrap him up in sheets and towels and place him in the back of the store in the storage room.
    That night, I make a list in the corner of my room with sharpie. Thirteen names, starting with the oldest and ending with the youngest. Carefully, with a shaking hand, I draw a line through Molly Faulk and Henry Quigley. I place the sharpie on the table next to my hammock. This is life now. I take a deep breath and make myself a promise: no matter what happens, I will do my best to keep everyone alive. And no matter how many people die, I will stay strong.

A/N

This part is kind of long, but I wanted to make up for the short chapter before.
This chapter is also really sad, but I hoped you enjoyed it anyway.
:)

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