Love is not a black eye.

weighing out my options

A/N: so I just got soooo pissed off. This chap was deleted so now I have to try & remember what exactly I wrote. -...- here's chapter 3...-.-

Jalia. . . .

This morning I woke up & vomited. Maybe it's just a stomach bug, I reasoned. That gotta be it. I must've caught something. But somehow, one word still floated around my tired brain..PREGNANT. I mean unfortunately, it was a possibility. Considering the fact that I'm constantly raped without a condom, I could possibly be pregnant. I really hope & pray that's not true. Trust me I would like to have children but not now. I don't want to bring no child into this world when I'm getting abused. It's just not safe. I sat on the edge of my bed, massaging my temples as a billion thoughts raced through my head at once. Sighing, I get up & prepare myself for the day. After I shower, I pack on as much makeup as I can to hide my battered face. I briefly stare at my broken reflection before blinking away. I felt tears threaten to escape my eyes as I stared at myself, looking at how much I had drastically changed. From the outside looking in, it would look as though I had the perfect life. But with this life comes a price..a heavy one at that. All of this does not amount to my happiness. Too bad I don't have much of a choice. Either I deal with it, or die. It's just that simple.

I force myself to look away from my reflection as I walk out the bathroom & start to dress myself. I choose a Ralph Lauren cardigan with some ripped true religions & some ugg boots. Anthony said I have to cover myself at all times. No skin showing whatsoever unless I'm at home. It's one of the ground rules he made up for me to follow. Putting on my dark sunglasses, I grab my keys & head out the door.

When I arrived at the doctors office, I was beyond nervous. My palms were sweaty & I was practically shaking.

"Jalia Thomas?" the nurse called. I rose from my seat, cautiously walking to the back to be seen by the doctor. "Go ahead to room 5 sweetie. The doctor will be in shortly." the nurse said politely. "Thank you." I forced a smile as she nodded & left. I plopped down onto the examiner table & awaited for the doctor to come in. After what seemed like hours, she finally strolled in. "Jalia Thomas is it?" she asked. "Ja-leah. Not jayla. It's pronounced different." I corrected politely. She nodded. "And You're here for?" "A pregnancy test." I spoke shakily. "Okay Mrs. Thomas, I need you to take this cup & go urinate in it." She handed me the cup & I snatched it, anxious to find out the truth.

I did my business, And handed the cup to the lab tech. "The reuslts will be back shortly." he said. I nodded & slumped down in my seat. The minutes drug on And on. After about a half hour or so, the doctor returned in the room with a bright smile.

"Congratulations Mrs. Thomas. You are indeed pregnant." I showed no emotion. I just looked at her with a blank face. Mostly because I was scared for my baby's life. I didn't know what I was going to do. "Thank you ma'am." I said, faking a smile as I rushed out of the doctors office. The whole drive home, tears poured down my cheeks. I rushed upstairs when I got home & vomited again. My makeup was smeared from sweat & tears. I sat on the ground crying my eyes out. I spotted a pair of scissors on the floor & reached out to grab them, aiming at my wrist. I contemplated suicide. Maybe it would be better that way. But then it dawned on me that not only was I living for me, but I now was living for the baby growing inside of me. If I was going to live, then I was going to fight for our lives. I'll be damned if let my child live like this. ENOUGH IS ENOUGH.

& WAM. There it is. oooopppp Jalia done had enough. Next chapter will def have a little action.

VOTEEEE & COMMENT.

until next time..

-Jay. ♥