Power Hungry

Chapter Four

Naya whirled on Alan, shoving him away from Polo. His face was blank as the knife tumbled from his hand to the ground.

It didn't occur to Naya to hold Polo, to check his vitals. It didn't even flash across her mind to soothe his passing. Her only thought was that Alan was dangerous. This is not my Alan. He's changed. He's different , was all that was going through her mind.

As Alan stumbled backward, not out of shock of what he did to his friend, but surprised by Naya's blunt force, she ran. Naya whipped past Alan, wanting - needing - to get as far away from him as possible, but his hand caught her sleeve. Naya didn't hesitate. She struggled against his grip for only a moment, tearing free from his grasp, a piece of cloth left in his clenched fist.

Naya didn't look back at the savage Alan as she ran. She didn't know where she was running to either. All Naya knew was that she had to get away from the new Alan that had just killed his friend.

It felt like hours that Naya tore through the forest. The branches reached for her, she evaded them; twigs snapped at her ankles, she ran past them; mosses hanging from trees hung in her way, and she ignored them the entire time. Naya was beyond terrified. She hadn't a clue what to do next.

Alan had been the one person she'd trusted in the world. The only person left for her. But now... Now I've lost Alan too.

Finally, Naya had to stop. Her lungs were screaming at her, demanding a rest, but it was her legs that were the first to give up. She wanted to push them farther, but they wouldn't budge. Her knees locked, pain lacing up her calves, and she fell to the ground, gathering more scrapes.

Naya's pounding head rested on the forest floor, and she found she couldn't bring herself to care about the sticks and stones poking her and digging into her scalp. At that moment, two things mattered in Naya's life: her fear of Alan and her tiredness.

After a moment, Naya had the urge to run again. It thrummed through her - and urgent need. She couldn't satisfy it, though, to her disappointment. Naya couldn't even lift her head. It simply wouldn't budge. She assumed it was her wild, primal instinct telling her that she was still too close to Alan-the-killer and that she needed to leave. Only, Naya had no clue of as to where she could go.

There was always the option of the abandoned pottery shop, but it was on the other end of the city, and it would take Naya half the night to get there. Another thing that kept her from the closest thing she'd ever had for a home was the fact that Alan knew about it.

There was some part of Naya that told her she would be okay, and that no matter what Alan did to that guard, he would never hurt her. Naya felt that that was the truth, but the rational part of her denied it. Logically, she knew that considering what Alan had just done, he could never be trusted. But still... He's still Alan... He's still Alan... isn't he? Naya desperately wanted to believe that, but she wouldn't let herself. She didn't want to be disappointed by Alan yet again. He'd betrayed her once, and then he'd taken Polo's, his alleged friend's, life for no good reason. This wasn't the Alan she cared for. Not even close.

And so, it caused Naya great panic, when the bushes swishing to her right parted to reveal that tanned, exposed face she knew so well.

"Don't be scared," he said. It was impossible not to be scared.

Naya scrambled to her knees, but she didn't have the strength to stand up. She was petrified of the boy she'd once thought she would one day marry.

"I don't..." he started. "I don't know how to explain this."

"There is no explanation." Naya's voice shook, but she liked the way it still sounded firm.

"Please..." His exposed eyes were pleading. "I never want to scare you. You know I'd never hurt you, Naya."

"No, I don't. Polo thought you'd never hurt him, and you - You killed him. You just killed a man, Alan!" There were tears streaking Naya's face, but she couldn't recall shedding them. She didn't care, either.

"I didn't..." A glance at Naya's face stopped his sentence. "Yes, I did. I admit that." He gulped. "But... You don't understand why."

"Nor do I want to! You're a murderer! A murderer..." Naya's voice trailed off with a sob, and this time she knew she was crying. She didn't care. She wanted Alan to see her cry. She wanted it to hurt him to see her hurt. Naya didn't know why she thought he'd still care, but for some odd reason, she hoped he did.

"Naya..." Alan approached her carefully, as if walking up to a spooked animal. Naya had a feral look in her eyes, and Alan didn't want to chance her temper with her glimmering daggers so easily accessible. "Please..."

When Naya didn't move away, Alan got closer. Three feet away from where she crouched, he stopped. He crouched down as well, leveling his face with her's. Naya saw a calm exterior, but she knew Alan was concealing a tsunami of emotions. Most Ventrallans used masks to cover their true feelings, but Alan never really needed a mask. It was his instinct to hide, to cover up. That was something Naya had once found endearing. She'd taken it as her mission to get him to expose himself to her. Now, she found it repulsive that he could never be himself.

"Get," Naya's voice was trembling with fury, "Away. From me." Naya shifted, putting her hand closer to her boot, where Alan knew one of her daggers always rested. Naya had no real intention of pulling it on him, but she wanted him to know the threat was there, even if he doubted her as well.

Alan rose to his feet and slowly backed away from Naya, his hands up in front of himself in surrender. Naya's mouth was pursed, barely keeping in her hatred. Alan saw how she thought of him in that moment, and Naya noticed as the realization dawned on him. She really did hate him, he'd truly ruined it, and it looked like he'd been stabbed in the gut, just like he'd done to Polo.

"I want you to leave. Right now." Naya had no remorse in her voice. She felt none inside either. Gone was the Alan she'd thought she'd loved, and so gone was the Naya that was considerate and caring. Alan had turned ruthless and savage, and so had she.

"Naya-"

"No! You do not get to talk to me anymore! I want you to leave! I want you out of my sight this instant, Alan!" Naya surprised herself with the screeching tone her voice reached, but she wasn't embarrassed, and she wouldn't regret it. She had every right to hate him, and he knew it.

"Okay." It was a mumble. Barely an acknowledgment.

"If I ever see you again, Alan, I will kill you, just like you killed that boy. I hope you know he looked up to you. And then you stabbed him." Naya couldn't resist it. She needed to rub it all over him. Alan had killed his friend, and she needed him to feel the pain. She hadn't even known the boy, but she needed Alan to hurt over it. She needed him to feel remorse, and to show it as well. Regret. Something. Anything other than the stone-hard look that constantly encased his beautiful face.

Alan kept his head tilted firmly to the ground. Naya felt a sick sort of accomplishment in knowing that she'd hurt him. She'd broken him.

"When you're ready-"

"I never want to see you again."

"If you're ever ready... Speak to Karlen, at the palace. She'll be able to help you with... things. She has food, other resources. And she knows about your mother-"

"Don't you dare! Get out of my sight!" Naya was yelling through the tears, and she couldn't tell what was more overpowering: her pain or her anger. It was blinding her to everything else. She didn't even wonder, in that moment, who Karlen was.

The world was a blur of shining stars and fuzzy trees. Naya didn't stop a single tear. She would cry for the dead.

When Naya was finally able to make out shapes through her tears, she looked up. She didn't know what she expected to see, but Alan was gone. Of course. It is what I'd wanted, after all. Still, there was some part of her that had craved him to sit with her while she cried, hug her, hold her. But that could never be Alan, because Alan was the one who'd caused her pain.

It could never again be Alan who comforted her, because that Alan was gone.