Left Behind (Snowbaz fic)

Chapter: 17

                                   SIMON
   "I told you everything was going to be okay, Snow,"
   My heart began to race as the cloaked figure slowly lifted his hands to his hood. When I finally saw his face the nervous pounding of my heart was replaced with a swell of pure joy.
   "Baz?" I was almost too stunned to speak. "Is that really you?"
   Baz smiled, his gleaming white smile, and nodded. "It's really me, Simon, I'm here."
   He looked perfect. Almost too perfect to even be real. He reminded me of a porcelain doll, completely free of flaws and imperfections. The only thing that was different about him was that his skin wasn't its usual grayish tone. It was the purest of white, like snow. And there seemed to be a dull halo of light around his body.
   "Well?" He said, his voice booming all around me. "Aren't you going to come over here and kiss me?" He opened his arms, beckoning me to fall into his embrace.
   A smile spread across my lips. It was actually him. I didn't care how he got here. All that mattered was that he was safe and in one piece. Before I could run into Baz's arms a hand caught my sleeve.
   "Simon!" Said Penny as she gave my sleeve a sharp tug. She had a worried expression on her face that I didn't quite understand.
   "Simon, what the hell? You just got up and walked into the forest all alone. How could you leave me like that? I was scared shitless!"
   "Penny, I'm sorry. I wasn't thinking. But look!" I turned back to where Baz was standing but he was gone. My heart plummeted in my chest.
   "What am I supposed to be looking at?" Asked Penny, craning her neck to look over my shoulder.
   "But he was there!" I shouted, "Baz was right there!" I thought that maybe if I shouted it loud enough he would hear me and make another appearance. But the only response to my yelling was the cawing of a crow and the flap of wings in the distance.
   Penny looked frightened and took another step closer to me. Her fingers still gripped tight around my sleeve. I could even see her knuckles turning white.
   "Simon, that's impossible. It can't be him. I know you want it to be him so badly but it's just your mind playing tricks on you. You're hurt and you're tired and-" I cut her off by ripping my sleeve away from her grasp. She didn't know what to do with her hands after that. She just held them awkwardly in the air for a few moments, I could see her fingers start to tremble.
   "I'm telling you it was him! I don't know how he got here but it's actually him!"
   Suddenly all the color in Penelope's face drained away. Her eyes widened and her eyebrows furrowed.
   "Simon, your eyes!" She moved her, still trembling, fingers up to my face and brushed the curls out of my eyes. A look of pure horror shone on her face. "Your eyes! They just changed color!"
   I didn't have enough time to process what she said because I heard the sound of a twig snapping behind me. I spun around and caught a glimpse of the tail of a black cloak disappear behind a large circus tent.
   "Baz!" I called and took off running after him.
   "Simon, wait!" Penelope called after me. I could hear her running footsteps a few feet behind me.
   I rounded the corner, I could feel Penny desperately pull at my sleeve again but I pulled away. I searched for any sign of Baz but there were none to be found. All I saw in front of me was the entrance to "Madam Charlotte's Maze of Mirrors,"
   I stepped onto the rickety steps, each one making a loud creak under my weight. I stepped inside the cobweb covered room. The first thing I saw was myself reflected in about a dozen mirrors. I found it hard to believe that it was actually me. But the longer I stared I realized that this grotesque looking person was actually me.
   My hair was messy and stuck to my forehead with sweat. My face was hollow and pale and my eyes had dark rings under them. My clothes barely clung to my body, revealing my deteriorating wings. I didn't even have the strength to hold them up anymore. They just dragged across the floor leaving streaks of blood along the wooden floor of the mirror maze.
   I stared for another moment trying to imagine myself before all this happened. The harder I thought the more distorted the vision of my past self looked. Suddenly I noticed a shift in my reflection. My eyes flashed into a shade of glowing yellow for only a second.
   "Simon," I heard Baz say from beeper inside the maze. I ignored what I just saw in the mirror and walked deeper in the maze. Penny followed close behind me. I decided to let her hold onto my sleeve for the time being.
   "Simon, I don't like this," she said.
   "Didn't you hear him?" I asked, "He's in here!"
   "No, I didn't hear anything because there's nothing there!"
   "Don't be ridiculous, Penny!"
   We rounded a corner without managing to smack into any of the mirrors lining the walls. But what I saw before me made me stop dead in my tracks.
 
                               PENELOPE
   I could feel Simon's body tense up as we rounded the corner. I was so close to him that my face was almost buried in his shoulder. I didn't want to look over him and see what he sees. But when I finally built up the courage I saw that there was nothing to be seen at all. Just four mirrors lined up on a wall.
   "What is it?" I asked. He didn't take his eyes off the mirrors when he spoke.
   "Don't you see them?"
   "No, I don't, just tell me what you see."
   "It's Baz. But he's reflected in the mirror and it's not just him."
   "What do you mean?" I asked. I prayed to see what he sees so I can help him. I felt so blind and useless in that moment.
   "It's Ebb, The Mage, and a woman I don't recognize. They're all just standing there motionless."
   Simon pulled away from my grip and fell to his knees at the base of one of the mirrors. I could hear him mumbling Baz's name under his breath. He put his hands against the glass as if he could reach up and touch the image of Baz that he saw. But when he realized all he was touching was a cold, lifeless mirror Simon's hands balled up into fists and smashed against the glass.
   Broken glass spiderwebbed around his fist. Making his reflection look even more broken and distorted than he already was. When he pulled his hand away blood trickled down his fist.
   "Simon! Are you crazy?" I asked kneeling down and carefully taking his bloody wrist in my hand. I ripped the hem of my shirt and wrapped it around Simon's blood soaked knuckles. 
   He winced slightly and stared at his bloody hand as I tied the fabric around it. He looked dazed, in some sort of trance that he couldn't escape from.
   He looked me in the eyes with a blank expression on his face. I saw his eyes flash that catlike, yellow color again. The color was more vibrant and intense than ever before it faded away into Simon's familiar blue.
   When all the color faded away I could see Simon's eyes fill with tears. His face softened, his shoulders slumping, like he couldn't hold himself up anymore. He finally looked like he was out of the fog that clouded his own head.
   "I don't know if I can do this anymore," he mumbled.
   "Yes, you can. We can do this together." I hugged him tightly and I could feel him crumple in my arms. I held onto him while his heart breaks. "I believe in you, Simon," I whispered over and over again in his ear.
   "I can't do this anymore!" He said in between sobs. This was not the Simon I know. The Simon I grew up with would never admit defeat. The Simon I held in my arms was broken and pushed to his very limits. I tried desperately to keep him from going past the point of no return.
   "Yes, you can. Just think of all the things you've done. All the people you saved."
   "None of that matters now!" He protested.
   "It matters to me. You saved my life too."
   He went silent for a moment, tears still escaping his eyes. I didn't know what else to do so I started humming a made up tune.
   My voice echoed through the mirror maze we found ourselves stumbled into. I just wish that this was some twisted nightmare and I would wake up to everything being normal. But now I feared that I would never wake up, things never getting back to normal.
   I hummed until I could feel Simon's body finally relax and slump further into my shoulder. He was asleep. His shallow breaths were almost melodic in the silence that surrounded us. I focused on Simon, sound asleep in my arms, and not the erie reflections in the mirrors all around us. The more I looked the more unnatural and distorted our reflections became. Our features were shrouded in shadow making us look so unlike the people we used to be.
   I tried to recall the happy days with Simon and Agatha. Going to classes and not having to worry about what comes next. That's all I find myself worrying about these past few days. Next. What could possibly happen next after this? Even if we do find what we've been looking for and rescue Baz, what's going to happen next? How can something go back to normal when it's been destroyed beyond repair?
   I looked down at Simon in my arms. He looked so broken and vulnerable. All I wanted was for him to sleep and regain the strength he needs to finish this. It's like this world is designed to try to kill Simon Snow. Or to push him past his breaking point so he can't carry on any longer.
   My eyes drifted from Simon's sleeping face to the cracked mirror in front of me. Simon's blood dripped from where his fist made contact with the glass. For just a second I saw something flicker in the cracked mirror. One second it the there and the next it was gone. I didn't want to look any longer. I buried my face in the crook of Simon's neck and begged for sleep to take me away from this place.