I Don't Care What's in Your Hair, I Just Wanna Know What's on Your Mind

Chapter 8: Wrong Boy and Desperate Kisses Turns into The Right Lover

After my long, teared session with Dani, she fell asleep. The doctor told us, before we left, that she would be out of the hospital in a couple days.

Later that night, I talked to Sodapop. I was so tired that I was falling asleep conversing with him.
"What was up with that..that agreement?" I slurred while rubbing my eyes.
"Anna, you seem tired, why don't you go to bed? We will talk this out in the mornin'," he promised.
I denied it, "I'll be back."
I went to the bathroom, splashed water on my face, and woke up instantly. I came out enraged.
"Tell me the agreement," I demanded.
Soda was shocked that I came back fully awake and now irate.
I sat down with him, it was just us two.
Maybe trying to pry nicely and not demand will get things going.
Calmly, I asked, "What was the agreement over? I just wanna know.."
Then, when I looked down, my hand was on his. I blushed and took it away.
He looked down, "Look, Anna.."
Soda moved himself to the other direction, trying to avoid eye contact, "I love you, and it'd be hard for me to see you with someone else. Just like you didn't wanna see Dallas with someone else."

That statement hit home to my heart, I knew what it felt like to look at someone you liked or loved, and them being with another person made you feel envious or perturb.

"So, we made an agreement," he started, "No, not to stop talking to you. But, I wanted you to be mine, Anna. With you not feeling the same way as me, it made it harder."
His face was soft and the tone of his eyes seemed tender.
Soda's voice cracked, "Have you just ever loved someone so much that you felt so incomplete without them?"
I remembered my constant feeling of being incomplete, and when I found out Dani was my sister, that state of incompletion was filled.
I nodded and faintly whispered, "Yeah.."
"Anna, I feel like you complete me. We've been friends forever, and who you are has just grown on me so much that I love you for everything that makes you you.
I'm just like you, wanting to scream my feelings out to you so I don't feel so locked away, I've felt like this for years. I just never had the good place and time to tell ya."

I felt guilty sitting here listening to him rack out his feelings. It reminded me of how I acted towards his loving affections towards me.
I swallowed hard as my chest and throat felt tight
"Dallas has known forever, that's why this secret endorcement was made. It was for him to lay off a little bit so I could spend time with ya- you guys hang out so much and I'm always busy working," he finally spoke about the agreement. He mentioned the purpose earlier, not the agreement itself.
He got up and paced around, "Oh, I sound so childish saying all of this."
Soda fell into the couch and mutely cried, "I'm sorry."
I made out what he said just through lip movement. He was really torn up by all of this. Urgingly through gut instincts, I walked over to Sodapop and sat down in next of him. He faced me and I turned to him.
Leaning my head against his and wrapping my arms around his neck, I mumbled softly, "Don't you cry no more."
He wiped his face as I kissed him before he had a chance to say anything else. I felt his hand slide behind my back to support me, Soda scooted me in closer.

I was really suprised with my move, I think he was, too. But, something about this conversation just made me do it. No, it wasn't out of guilt or pity- I think it was the actual feeling of doing it out of true love.

"Soda, if you're gonna do anything, go to your-" he suddenly stopped and realized the lips Soda was interacting with.
He practically face palmed as Soda let go of me, I blushed so hard I was as red as a balloon.
He looked up and gave a smile, "Sorry, Darry."
Then Dallas came trucking through as I was still sitting really close to Soda.
"Hey Anna, are we gonna talk abou-hey, woah, woah, woah," he backed up and covered his eyes jokingly, "take it to your room, Soda."
Through his hands, I could see him wink at Soda and back up into Two-Bit who backed into Steve.
"Hey, Soda, you gonna make more cho-" Steve interrupted our kiss with a cake covered face. "Goddammit, Soda, take it to your room. That's the third comment in the last five minutes."
"Ya'll are babies," he complained.

I realized, as I layed on Soda, that I never really liked or loved Dallas like I thought. When your best friend gets a partner, its different because you don't want them to exclude you out of their life or forget about you. I guess only envy, sadness, and anger disguised themselves as feelings, and convinced me that I really did have affections for him. When, in all reality, I was just in dismay.

"I'll be back," I said getting up.
He held my hand as I got up, pleading me through his eyes to stay.
I kissed his forehead and told him I'll only be gone for a moment, that I had to deal with another small problem.
"Dallas, can we talk for a second?" I popped in the room he was in.
"Sure," I lead us outside in the back.
"What's up?" He asked.
"I just wanted to clear about earlier.." I started, looking at the sky.
"Crazy how feelings change, huh?" He took his last drag on his cigarette.
"No, it's not that I changed my feelings," I divulged in a somewhat nervous manner. I don't know why I was so nervous to say anything, he was taken and he loved Dani.
"It's just, I don't think I ever did really love you. I think I was just in distress because you never really had a girlfriend, it's always just been us being two goofy best friends. I guess I was just flustered that you started to ignore me and stuff, I was afraid that you'd forget about me."
That sounded alot better explaining it than what I thought in my head a few moments ago.
"Aw, Anna," He brought me in for a hug. "I'd never forget about ya, man, don't think like that."
I smiled, his sincerity creeped me out. "We good?"
"We always have been, it'll stay like that, too," he smiled at me.
I grinned back and punched him in the arm.
"Hey, don't get too bummed over that agreement," Dallas mentioned before I went in. "He did it because he loved ya, not because he wanted to cause probelms or make things worse."
I smiled, "Thanks."
He whipped out another cigarette and his lighter, "Anytime, man."
I walked in and sat back on the couch next to Soda. I felt him lightly grab my hand as our fingers interlocked.
"So, are you mine now?" He grinned crazily.
I couldn't help but flash a smile, "Of course I am."
He held my hips and crashed his lips into mine, hearing the bothered groans from the boys in the background.

Relief washed over me, two problems covered, one more to go.