It's midnight and they're in Liam's suite. They'd mutually decided that staying in Niall's room wouldn't be the best thing.
they're sat on the couch, watching Seven pounds on the television, and Liam sits up from where he's been leaning on Niall's chest, quiet and warm.
"Ni-"
"Ssssh," he says, and Liam's looking at him. His eyes are still wet, but he looks down at his mouth, and he's transparent. Niall tells him, "You can kiss me, if you want."
His eyes flash to look up at him, and he says in a small voice, "It's okay, we don't need to."
"We've done much more in the past few years, you can kiss me," Nialls says, brushes his thumb against his cheek. Just the edge of it, where it's sharp, not as soft as the rest of Liam's face.
He looks at Niall again, and comes forward nervously. Presses a chaste kiss on his lips, and Niall responds in kind. Presses his lips against the kiss and deepens it, holds him there.
"I love you, Nialler," he murmurs, and this isn't what he pictured how this last few nights would turn out. Knows he can't expect anything like before; light, happy, teasing, playful. Too late for that now, but he doesn't want Liam like this.
"I love you too, Li," he replies, plays with the hair on the back of his head, then pulls him back in for another kiss. Lets Liam graze his lips over his face, every part of him that he can reach. Closes his eyes as another soft kiss finds its way to his jaw. Melts in his arms, one more time.
**
They go, for one last time, this time on Liam's bed. Opens him up slow and careful and silent, fucks him with his heart right up in his throat. Stares down at Liam the entire time, and Liam stares right back, their lips never far from the other. Just hovers, skimming over skin, sometimes kissing, always close.
His chest feels too tight, like whatever's in it, it doesn't belong to his body anymore, can't be contained within its confines.
When Liam comes undone beneath him, moaning into his mouth and drawing his own high right out of him with the right push, it kills him inside, because it's become much too clear to him, where it's gone.
**
He leaves the following afternoon.
He dresses quietly, sat on the edge of the bed, and Liam watches just as silently, naked with the duvet pooled over his body up to his waist.
Niall ties his shoes, ignores the painful sensation his stupid heart is pounding on, and stands up from the bed. Combs through his hair with his fingers and looks at him, tries to control his emotions.
"I'll be leaving, then," he says, voice barely audible, but the room is quiet. He knows he's heard, loud and clear. "Need to pack, and. Everything."
Liam gives a small nod to show he understands. His hands are clenched around the duvet cover, tight and unyielding.
"Liam," he comes forward, and takes his face in his hands. Decides to give in one more time, and kisses him softly, just the gentlest touch of his lips on Liam's, but he makes it count. Makes it linger, lets him feel it.
Liam cranes his neck up to follow his mouth, and his heart swells. Allows him to cup his face and reel him back in again, and he doesn't do much more than just kiss him. Over and over, until he can feel him tremble against him, just the slightest shiver that gives him away.
"Take care of yourself, Li," he tells him, pulling away.
Liam's quiet again, then he's saying, "I hope she treats you well. I hope she loves you, more than I love you."
Niall pauses, has to, takes a deep breath to collect himself. "Find someone you love, more than you love me."
"They don't exist," is Liam's reply, quiet and genuine, before he looks away and curls back into bed. Doesn't respond when Niall says his name, and he takes that as his leave, chest tight with everything he didn't say.
Rushed and Short chapter but eeeehhhh my heart.
