Animal

.:19:.

I had the dream again, the one where I was running as fast as I could. I was running with others, not away from them.

The earth underneath my paws comforted me, the twigs that brushed through my fur as I ran only made me want to run faster, longer.

Just as the calls of the other animals sounded, I was startled awake. The sheets around me stuck to my skin, and dawn light barely peeked through the half shut curtains.

I turned over onto my back and stared at the ceiling, not kicking the articles of blankets off despite how hot I was. That dream ... Made me feel really good for some reason. My heart continued pounding rapidly in my chest, as though it were recovering from a real run. I drifted my hand up and rested it over my heart gently, listening to my breaths rhythmic repetition and feeling the heavy beating under my palm.

I slid out of the bed, resting my feet on the chilly wooden flooring. I moved my toes around, soaking in the nice coolness, then pushing myself off of the mattress. I padded immediately to the bathroom, ignoring the demanding growl of my stomach. Before I did anything else today, I was taking a bath. A nice long bath.

After filling the tub with warm water and bath salts that were under the sink, I shut the curtains of the window that rested above the tub. Despite the bathroom being on the side of the house where it showed nothing but the backyard and the forest, I still didn't want to risk being seen in my birthday suit.

I pulled off my clothes that were stuck to my skin by sweat, sighing when the conditioned air overpowered the sticky humidity and sending an army of goosebumps along my body.

I felt the sudden need to be as clean as possible. I stopped standing in the middle of the bathroom like an idiot and stepped into the tub, sinking as low as I could. My head was still surfaced, but the rest of my body was surrounded by the gentle lapping of water.

I moved my hands around lazily within the water, closing my eyes. I was sure that I would be falling asleep any moment now if I were to allow myself to.

To prevent from doing so, I let my mind wander. I lifted the thought-blocking barrier and waited for my mind to begin racing with questions, whispers, images, built up thoughts of any kind.

I first let my mind travel to my mom and dad. My parents ... What could they possibly be going through right now with me being assumed dead? Did they even know of my "death", or did they know everything about this terrible situation the government put me in? My parents were many things, ranging from neglectful to pretty damn smart, but I don't think they would put me through something so life-changing and keep me in the dark about it.

Are you sure about that? One of my little opposing voices whispered. Stop trying to block the real doubts out. It's very possible. You don't even know your parents very well.

I reached my hands up out of the water and lowered my head. My wet hands gently cupped my face, blocking out the lighting of the sun outside colliding halfway with the light the bathroom bulbs provided over the mirror.

My fucking conscious was a complete asshole for slapping me in the face with possible options, but it was true. I don't know my own parents very well, or what kind of work they do. Trust me, I would have loved to know my parents a whole lot more but they for some reason decided to have a kid just for ignoring. Okay, that was a little extreme, but there are times where I can do absolutely nothing to get their attention.

After sulking in the tub, the water was cooling down. I lifted my head from my hands and opened my eyes, searching for shampoo and soap. I reached over to the corner of the tub near my feet and grabbed a bar of soap.