Broken Illusion |Yoonmin sequel| #3 |

5. Apology

Everyone was excited for the concert, expect me. I just felt horrible bad. Though I did nothing wrong, I just felt so sorry.
It was fake, I knew it. But how was I gonna fix it?
I couldn't let it be as everyday I was losing Army's respect.

I wanted to apologise on stage from my heart, but manager Hyung thought it was too risky and gave me script to read instead.

Just before I Need U, we could take a little break and talk.

"Are you enjoying it so far?" Hoseok shouted.

"We're glad you came here today. Every single one of you. It hasn't been easy huh?"

"Jimin, you got something to say?" Jin asked me.

"Yeah... I'm so sorry everyone. I saw the trend on Twitter, #TellUsWhyJimin. I'm sorry that I let you down." I read the script, it wasn't my words but it was better than nothing.

"I'm so happy and grateful for you who still came. I don't know if it was for me, or the others. Ugh, I'm awful.
Mianhae, Saranghae, Yongseohae. I need u guys. Please forgive me." I went down to the floor and bowed.

"Maybe we should switch parts at I Need U, Jimin?" Taehyung hugged me from behind.

"I want to let you know, from the deepest of my heart. I apologise."

Suddenly I need u started to play. Jungkook beautifully sang Fall while Namjoon said Everything. Basically me, everything was falling.

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Before we leaved the stage, some tears where streaming down my cheeks.
I felt so bad for them, sure we had fun but it wasn't everything. It could've been better.

Just because of me, we lost the show, I lost Yoongi, I lost the respect and even my happiness.
Jungkook couldn't even make me smile.

A few days later I decided to do a spontaneous live stream on V-app. I had to tell Army the truth, from the bottom of my heart.

"Hello everybody. Oh I'm really live... Hi!
So since this is live, I don't have a plan or a script. Yeah... But I'll do my best. Though this will be awkward.
My hyung's will probably kill me after this. But I just want to be honest with you guys.

The photos you saw on Koreaboo, allkpop and other websites. They aren't real. I think they're photoshopped.
I'd never smoke, my father was a smoker. He told me, I should never try smoking. All my life I followed his advice, and I still do.
I know you guys would do anything with me. I want you to be healthy and happy. So smoking is a big no no and I will never ever try it. Never ever.
And the fan pic. Also photoshopped.
Sure, I walked past by. But this is also fiction. Yes, I walked past it. But I never went in there. You believed it because the caption said so?
As you all now, I'm a very busy man. I don't have time for that. And the fan... I would never do anything like that. I would take her or him to get some coffe. But nothing more.
You guys know me. Better than the media. And I want you to know... I love you.
Though I can't hear your voices clearly anymore, I can still read your comments. And that still touches my heart.
Thank you guys, for always being there. I hope you accept my apology. I don't usually do this but you guys deserve to hear the truth, from me. Thank you." I waved goodbye.

'Here comes the living hell...' Manager Hyung was upset as hell. But he couldn't yell at me. Instead he wrote everything down in a piece of paper. He was a lot calmer in the letter.

I got scolded, but I just ignored it as it was no big deal. I am human, I have to be real too.

But the haunting feeling still wouldn't leave me alone. It was still there. Because Yoongi wasn't happy.

I felt desperate. I did everything I could to move on, but nothing would help. And satisfying Yoongi was impossible.

Though I wanted something to take all the pain away, I couldn't make the rumour come true.
No drinks, no cigars, nothing addictive.

"Yoongi, I do miss you. Where are you?" I whispered to myself. I hugged my knees tight all let the tears out. Everyone fell asleep so easily while I started to have trouble sleeping.

I was tired of apologising, I was tired of running, I wanted everything to end.

"Morning boo... Time to wake up, the others are already in the dance practice room warming up." Jungkook gently shook my body so I would wake up. I was already awake, but I acted that I was sleepy.

"Okey..." I yawned. Didn't sleep at all.

"But we can warm up here, can't we?" Jungkook smirked at me.

I sighed and just let him kiss me.

But now... It didn't feel right.

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Bonus chapter!
Okey... This was supposed to be published on my birthday but Oops I pushed the published bottom though I didn't mean it... Sorry. Well I wasn't fast enough to unpublish this. Well.....
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Sorry this was short and just filler... I promise you'll love the next chapter >.<
I hope so...
Thank you for reading :)

- Ari 07.07.16