My greatest fear is of the darkness. It curls around me, snuffing out the last hopeful rays of light that I cling to. Submerging me in itself with nothing to grasp but my own trembling, anxiety stricken body, devouring everything yet it is only satisfied when I cry myself to sleep.
This introduction is important for you to understand before you can even begin to comprehend the following dark, inner musings of my mind. Disclaimer: these are just the ramblings of one who has not been sleeping enough, please do not take offense in my own personal opinion. Simply food for thought.
Many find sunsets to be beautiful or romantic, however, I do not see the beauty or romance in what I find to simply be a symbol for habitual abandonment. Why relish in the sight of the sun withdrawing from your sighteach night, leaving you alone in the darkness with only the company of the pale moon? No doubt the moon can be considered beautiful, but darkness finds a way of blocking that much-needed light.
When I am awake to see the sunset I know I am in for a long night, because I often cannot sleep after the light has retreated over the horizon. My mind plagues me with visions most foul, teasing me with my worst nightmares, holding me captive in my wide-awake state.
If only I would learn to see darkness as a lover, as a secret friend that caresses me in its embrace. If only my imagination would work for good at night. If only I were not condemned by this anxiety that holds me prisoner.....perhaps then I could finally and truly sleep.
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Little Old Me
RandomA collection of stories from life that I have learned, beginning with an introduction of the author.
