A Wanderer's Soul

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I wish to break these chains of silence
But my mouth doesn't want to speak
I wish to break this evil loneliness
But my mind only wants me
I try to break these dreadful habits
But all that breaks is my soul, you see
For all my body wants to do
Is cry itself to sleep

I look at the workload on my screen
And drift back to my bed
For how can I even try to read
With all the monsters in my head?
This mood will pass
Though for days it may last
As I cast my life aside
While I try and hope that I might
Defeat myself this time

I am not Depressed- don't call me that
Don't load me with medications
I'm just a wanderer's soul
With nowhere to go
And a past of sorrowful evasion

But even as I lay with gloom
I look toward distant lands
And future loves and future laughs
I shall unearth from these sands
For my life is a barren desert landscape
And I am trapped on the surface
But underneath is a Great Mystery
To be discovered in earnest.

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