Artifice

Uncertainty

"You do know those candles are a fire hazard?" I said looking around. I was exhausted by the last hours activities but the lit up candles were freaking me out.

I stood up from the bed and wrapped my bare body with the thin blanket on top of my bed. Harry was laid on his stomach with his briefs back on.

By now there were a few balloons that managed to sneak into the room when the door was open and hundreds of rose petals laying on the floor.

I walked around the room, blowing out each candle.

"Did you really leave them lit the entirety of the dinner?" I said in awe of how careless the idea was.

"No, When liz left she agreed to coming here quickly and doing it for me. I'm not an idiot." He rolled over and rested his head on his hands.

"Sure." I teased.

"You didn't like it?" He asked, the concern being evident in his voice.

"No, no I loved it." I assured him and made my way back to the bed, kissing his forehead. "This might be the best birthday I've had so far." I was being genuine.

By now it was near midnight and for once I was upset today was going to end soon.

"Is it weird that I love the smell when you blow out candles?" I asked, taking in a breath of the aroma inside my room.

"Not at all."

"And of gasoline, when you're pumping it up." I added causing him to chuckle.

"You're a strange one." He intently stared up at me sat up next to him. "I really care about you Evangeline." He said lowly, his face dropped from a smile to a frown.

"What's wrong?" I asked, confused by his change in mood.

"If I'm being totally honest, I'm scared." Harry said but his face didn't match his words. He held the same emotionless expression he usually put on.

"Harry Styles, scared? I've never heard such a bizarre concept." I laughed and his face didn't change. "Of what?" I asked noticing he probably wasn't joking.

"You." His eyes were trained on the floor.

"Me? You must be joking."

"I wish I was." He sighed and hid his face with his hands.

"What do you mean?" I swallowed.

"You. You." He repeated to himself. "God Evangeline, I've grown to care about you so much it scares me." I looked at him puzzled, having no idea how that worked out. "So much that I'm scared you'll leave me. That you'll resent me at some point and never come back to me. 'Cause I've done the one thing I swore I'd never do, start caring for someone."

"I would never leave you." My voice was near a whisper and my hands softly ran through his hair.

"Promise. Even though I have no idea what we are or what our future will be, promise you won't leave me."

Hearing him say all of this was great, I was over the moon but a part of me knew it was a mere fantasy.

"I promise." Guilt filled my stomach because I wasn't sure if I could keep it.

A part of me felt the same as he did, scared. Scared because I cared about him so much and with him everything seemed unpredictable. Harry made it clear he wasn't looking for a relationship from the start, regardless of the many nights and days we've spent together he never once brought up having a future with me. Harry was a bright light that appeared so suddenly in my life but with no certainty if it was here to stay.

We easily left the conversation at that and prepared ourselves to go to bed.

"I'm leaving tomorrow afternoon," I announced to him. He knew I was planning to visit home but I never mentioned when exactly.

"Oh." He shuffled around in the bed to face me.

"Are you doing anything for Christmas?" I asked hesitantly.

"No. I was thinking of visiting my mum back home but all the flights I've looked at were booked." He frowned. I didn't know whether to be upset that he never told me or assure myself it wasn't any of my business anyways.

"You know you could always come with me." I wasn't sure how he would react, I was insinuating that he should meet my family. "You being there would make it a little more bearable." He broke our eye contact and laid on his back, looking up at the ceiling.

"I don't know." He sighed.

"Oh, that's fine." My stomach twisted and I wanted leave the room out of being embarrassed.

"Christ, don't be mad. Give me the night to think about it okay?" He turned to me and gave me an apologetic smile, then kissing me softly.

I turned away from facing him and could feel him moving closer. Once his cold hand touched my shoulder I shivered, sending goosebumps all over my body.

"I like holding you like this." He whispered, his face being inches away from mine now.

The uneasy feeling I would get when we first met was still there. Although we've spent so much time together I still wasn't use to his touch, nonetheless the amount of affection he has been showing me the past few days.

My eyes grew heavy as he soothed his fingers down and up my arm.

"Eva," he whispered. "I need to tell you something."

"Sleep" I tiredly hummed, grabbing his hand and wrapping it around me.

This is short and pretty sappy but gurl let me just tell you how emotional I was writing this cause I'm listening to some sad music and all in my feelings. Anyways, hope it's good so far!