If Love Really Does Exist

Fell Into the Deep End

I woke up the next morning, warm but aching. I felt it in my chest. For a few sweet moments, I forgot about what Ryan did and it felt like a normal night with Jaime. Sadly, I blinked a few times and a wave of emotions hit me. I loved him, I still do. I'd never forgive him, though. He knew with me you one get one chance if you even get the first at all. I've been with him since my senior year of High school. Jaime and I had only known each other for a year when I met Ryan junior year.

August 20th, 2003

August again, time for dead leaves, dead ends and dead summer memories. This summer had been the best ever. I actually had a friend to spend it with. His name was Jaime. We watched tons of movies, he taught me how to yo-yo, and he was great at it. He also taught me how to play guitar and he sang me songs. It was amazing. And here we are again at the bottom of the steps at El Capitan High School. Our last year. He promised me we would make it even better than summer. I believed him, but I was still nervous. I only had Jaime and only one class with him. What was I going to do about the rest of my classes?

I walked slowly into my homeroom class, biting my lip unable to control my nerves. I knew everyone in the room but I'd also known them all of my life. We'd been thrown together as a homeroom because we shared the same beginning letter in our last names. C. I'd endured their games of making me suffer. I never talked much. Except for about class I never talked to anyone except Jaime. This year I could tell was going to be different. The bell rang and last second an unfamiliar face ran into the room.

"Sorry I'm late. It's my first day and I couldn't get my locker open." He went straight up to the teacher's desk. He had kind blue eyes and golden brown hair. I couldn't stop staring at him. He was beautiful. The teacher told him to sit down. The only seat was next to me. I bit my lip nervous of having him so close. I didn't understand why he made me so nervous. "Hey, I'm Ryan."

"Rosa," I said, looking down at my books. I tried to hide the fact that I had started shaking.

"Do you think you could give me a hand with my schedule?" He asked, his voice like honey. I mumbled a yes and gently touched his schedule, pulling it near me. His next class was English. It was on the other side of the building as my Art class. Then he had a foods class, which I knew Jaime had. Next was Study Hall which both Jaime and I had. I explained where his first two were and made him promise to meet me at my locker, where Jaime would too, before Study Hall. "I swear on my life and if I get lost I might as well disappear if I can't find my way to a pretty girl like you." He said, in a joking tone. I laughed at him, truly smiling. Then he found my sketchbook and asked to see it. I nodded allowing him to have it and we spent the rest of class discussing my drawings and joking some more.

When it came time to meet up at my locker I noticed Jaime hadn't been walking with Ryan, like I assumed. When he reached me I couldn't help but ask where Ryan was.

"I don't know where he went. I didn't bother following him." Jaime said, bluntly. It made me wonder what happened in foods. I didn't have time to question it because Ryan came walking up to us. He almost seemed hesitant. I gave Ryan a quick hug and we walked to study hall silently, with me in the middle.

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"Rosa, are you up?" Jaime's voice came sweetly to me. I was so lucky to have him with me.

"Yeah." I said my voice a little groggy.

"Good, I don't mean to do this to you but we should have breakfast with the guys and then on the way back we can get your car." Jaime started, "were leaving for Warped tonight." I bit my lip. I was scared, I barely knew the guys. I liked them I just never had the courage to really talk to them.