How To Become A Spy

DISCLAIMER *Please read first*

Hey there.

So here's the deal. I started writing this book when I was 14 years old. 

That was almost 7 years ago (ew, I feel old even realizing that). 

I'm 20 now, and while I look back at this story and cringe quite a bit, I owe a lot to this book. 

I never knew I wanted to write nor was it an ambition of mine to even try. One day, I just stumbled upon Wattpad and with no idea what I was doing, decided to upload some stories and type whatever came to mind. 

Writing on this website changed my life. It bumped up my English grades from average, to top of the class. It gave me the chance to recognize my love for writing/literature and allowed me to study it further after high school. At times, this book even took me away from my horrible experiences as a teenager and allowed me to escape to a world that I thought would be so much cooler to live in.

It made me actual real life friends that I got to hang out with (shoutout Lucyface and rdiamond89). It made me connect with cool people all over the world that I hope to meet and hang out with one day (shoutout zaraahlie, MelodyHall, ShaunAllan, gabycabezut, RachaelMole, Tangerine_Dream - I still think of you all from time to time). 

I owe a lot to this book. But that being said,

it's kind of shit. 

I'm sure a lot of writers can go and look back at their cringe writing from when they were younger and think the same thing, and I'm in no way trying to discourage you from reading this book if it's what you're into. But from where my writing standards are now, and all the studying I've undertaken, I can't help but look back at this book sometimes and think: YIKES. 

Personally, I can't even read it myself. It's like looking back at how you would message your crush in junior year or watching that shitty monologue you had to say outloud to your drama class in the ninth grade. It's just fucking yikes.

Things that I hate about this book aside from it's shitty writing:

- One dimensional characters

- Obvious stereotypes, tropes, and cringey written dialogue

- The MC being a quite the occasional dumbass

- Chapters that explain too much and others not enough

- Underdeveloped romantic relationships

- The completely illogical events that occur constantly

Nevertheless, I've decided to keep this story up here. Whenever I took it down I would get DMs asking where it went and complaints about its removal and I always felt REALLY bad about that. It's so shocking to me that people are still reading it to this day.  I know a lot of people at the time liked it (and I thank you endlessly for that), but mostly, I want to keep it up because I trying not to be ashamed of my past. This book was never going to be anything of literary merit, but to me, it always will be something that was significant to my growth as a person. I'll never forget the characters I created, the plotlines I brainstormed (as bad as some may be) and most of all, the way it saved me from my own reality at times. 

That being said, I'm back now (after a 2-3 year hiatus), and finally want to write again. I had to take a lot of time to figure myself out, but writing has, and always will be my home and my escape no matter what I end up doing in life. 

This book was edited for the first few chapters, but after that, kind of diverts back to my 'fresh into high school' style as I attempted to edit this a few years back, but have decided its one of those things best left in the past untouched as I move on and write things I'm more interested in now.

I hope you guys will stick with me on this journey (if you've been around for a while, I am in awe and admiration at how you've managed to put up with me - if you're new, hi! I'll try to suck less and disappoint you not too frequently).  

My writing will continue to grow as I do and while it will never be perfect and many may hate it, it's those who stick around and support me that I hope to become close with and continue to write for. 

To everyone on this site: thank you for being my family. I'm so lucky to have you, and will never forget what all this support has done for me. Let's continue to grow together over the next few years. 

All the best, 

Meg xxxx