Not Another Cheesy Romance Novel

October 30, 2015 (Jaime)

I loved Isaiah so much. I guess he never felt the same. He was always trying to get rid of me, and start fights for no reason. It hurt. We had different opinions, and views, and wanted different things, but that didn't change the fact that I loved him. He hurt me so much, but I kept going back because I absolutely adored him. I'm not sure why, I guess he never felt the same. Love was hard, I knew that already. I never imagined it would be this bad though. I guess somethings aren't meant to be, you know?

As I rolled away from his beautiful face, on this early 3AM morning, tears fell down my face. It was really over. It was all over. I didn't know where to go, but I would figure it out. Him and Casey would be together, they would get a house, have a life, kids, a family. I didn't want all that, he did. Settling down sounded scary, you know? Having kids and family, and one day, it all goes away, they stop loving you. They cheat. They fall in love with someone else. It hurt to think about that. The world made me cold you know?

I kissed his forehead before I left, like how he used to do me. I would miss him so much, I knew he'd miss me too, but didn't know why. He never cared all that much, he didn't care what I did, I liked it, but I wanted to feel loved sometimes.

After walking around for awhile, I stopped outside of a gas station, and sobbed. A man walked up, and asked if I was okay. I told him I was fine, but he didn't believe me. He looked a little older, but not very old, maybe in his 40s or 50s. He did his best to comfort me, and asked me if I needed a place to stay, and I told him yes. He wiped my tears and we walked into the gas station, he bought me a soda and some candy. I was grateful, I said "thank you" so many times to the man on the ride to his house.

Once we got there, I walked inside, and he directed me to an empty room, that he told me, belonged to his son when he wasn't away at college. His wife told me, dinner would be soon. She was beautiful. She was kind of short, with medium length blonde hair, that was curly and bright blue eyes, her teeth were straight and her accent was very country, but it was comforting. She had made green beans, baked beans, and pork. It was delicious compared to what I ate at Dylan's. We made some small talk at dinner, and then I went upstairs and took a warm shower.

I couldn't sleep at all that night, everything reminded me of him. The warm sheets, the smell of them. I cried and cried and cried. It was 4Am. I missed him more than anything. My heart felt like it had been pulled out of my chest and stomped all over and then when he decided to return it to me, he acted like it wasn't in horrible condition and barely working. I would still give it right back to him in a heartbeat, a slow, painful heartbeat. He broke my heart more everyday, and I guess I liked it, because I always forgave him.

A phone rung, it was him. He always said our hearts always ended up finding each other, I could hear him sobbing, and apologizing. It was annoying, he wasn't sorry, and I knew that. I didn't know what to say though. So I said "I.. I can't..." , hung up the phone, and returned to my sobbing.