It's not something that I expected. But I can't say that it's something that I didn't want. From the outside, he looks so simple. But there is so much more to the boy that tempted me. I am so scared. So scared. So fragile. Cold. Broken. And what do I have to offer him but a small cold body almost incapable of breathing? Because before we sat under the beautiful stars, I was so dangerously close to destroying myself. But then he told me to look up. At the stars. And told me that this is where we belonged. He took my cold hand and I cried. Because I was so scared of breaking and being broken. This boy, he was different. He told me he would never leave me. He hugged me and I wanted to spend what felt like eternity in his arms. He smelled so good. He smelled safe. He smelled scary. I want him. So badly. I just want to be fixed. This boy tempted me. Inhaling every word he says in a big cloud of smoke. His smell makes me so high. And all I want is to be intoxicated by him. All I want is to be destroyed so badly. So much in pain. He asks me if I wanted to know. To know what it felt like to feel safe. I gave him what I had been holding on to for so long. This boy tempted me. But it wasn't his fault. Because I so badly wanted to be tempted. We lay on the blanket under the stars. Hand in hand. Heart in heart. I let him invade me. I let him search for my cold black heart. I was so scared. So scared. Because when the stars go away and the sun comes out to play, would this boy still be here to save me from myself? Because I so badly want to be saved by him. I want his soul to run through my body. I wanted to be one with him. Please. "Don't leave me alone under the stars", I whisper to him. He turns to face me. This is the boy that tempted me.
