Half a Heart

Okay, Read This. Please.

Okay, okay, okay, okay. I know, I know this is the second "read this" in this book and I only have like ten chapters altogether but I have a reason for that and I am explaining bc I love you all for some wild reason (kidding you're all adorable af and I can't get enough of you lovely's)

Alright so as you all obviously know, I haven't updated in about three years. Well, during this time span, I've recently been at the hospital, been terribly stressed out with other shit from home, been trying really hard to upload a YouTube video bc ngl I would really like to have fun filming videos and so far I am, but honestly life's been kinda crappy in general :/

So yeah, I apologize, I really do, for not updating and stuff it's just- UGH! Life's hard right now babes and I'm really trying and I'm going and writing! It's just... I don't know guys. It's really really hard to explain. I suck at expressing myself in words. Like, I'm not finding the motivation like I used to and that honestly scares me. Certain things having to deal with me in general are getting really bad and my anxiety has been crazy lately and I'm honestly freaking out on the inside all the time and I don't know why.

I feel really bad though, I honestly do. I feel bad that I haven't updated really any of my books at all and I feel bad that I'm not as active on Wattpad as I was- I don't even talk to any of you lovely readers much anymore either. I want to tho. I want to get back into updating on a regular basis, I want you guys to comment on my books, add them to your reading lists- it makes me so happy to know people enjoy what I've written even when I thought it was horrible, but you guys still seem to love everything and I don't know why.

If I'm being honest, I wasn't planning on writing this little thingy- but I knew that I needed to. You're all right beside me as I go through all of this, all the time, and I feel I owe you all since I haven't been doing much of really anything lately like I should be and it makes me feel so freaking bad and I really stress out because I know you all deserve so much more than what I'm writing and AGH.

*cries*

I really can't describe what or how I'm feeling right now. I'm not happy- but I'm not exactly sad either. I'm literally caught right in between all these emotions and I honestly feel so empty you guys. I don't really know what I'm doing anymore.

.... But I'm trying. Not only for myself, but for you guys, and for my family, my sister and my best friend. I promise I'll be better and try my hardest with everything... And I do mean everything.

This may seem like a little too much to some of you, but I felt the need to write this down, okay? And you guys- if you need anything, or anyone to talk to I am ALWAYS here for you. Don't be afraid to message me because I swear I'll reply as soon as I can and we can talk.

I'll try my best to update weekly from now on, because this book does need to get along and I know some of you are depressed due to this book being depressing- but trust me, the sad mood will be over soon. I promise.

Now then! Let's just get all of this going!? Okay!? I've got this, I've got you, You got me (hopefully) I don't know what I'm saying anymore but that's okay because I'm going to go and write the next chapter for you babes!!

Let's try to be happy now, yeah? Let's raise this sad-like mood and try our best to at least be okay, okay!? ALRIGHTY!!!

Now then! I will update ASAP and I mean that!! Now if you would like, it'd be really cool if you got to know me!! So? Check down below and those are my social media's plus YouTube channel to check out if you have time :)

Twitter ---> @ ItsSteffiMarie
Instagram ---> @ ItsSteffiMarie
YouTube Channel ---> ItsSteffiMarie

Please follow and subscribe? It'd be a really cool experience and I'd love to get to know you guys and hopefully you can get to know me through those! Especially my YouTube channel, I think it'd be a really cool experience for both of us!

Speaking of my YouTube channel.. I have a favour to ask you! So the next video I am going to be doing the whisper challenge, (maybe) which means I need help on saying things to my best friend and sister for the video...

Could you comment down below what I should say during the whisper challenge video?? Lemme know! Try making them hard so that some they won't get lol.

I have to go, sadly, bc I am leaving my house apparently (for the first time in years) and even though I don't want to go and interact with humans I have to -.-

So, bye my lovely's :( I love you all so much, and I'll update asap okay??

Xxx

P.s. Thank you for reading this, it means a lot you guys... Thank you for being you.

~S ☺️💙