Chapter Eight

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The Set Up

Chapter Eight

Shaking my head, I made my way back to the kitchen.

"You okay?" My mom asked.

"No. Actually, I'm pretty far from okay. I'm about as screwed up as I can get right now without actually being committed." I sighed and leaned back against the fridge, closing my eyes and trying to suppress the terror inside just long enough to breathe again.

"I think I understand now." She said, and stood beside me. "You know, sometimes relationships, they can be difficult. But, when you love someone and they turn out to be a good friend too, you can really make things work out for the best." I opened my eyes to look at her. She was being weird again. "When you're close to someone for a long time, and those feelings grow into something more, it can be hard to move from one emotion to the other. There are gonna be some 'bumps' along the way..."

"Huh?" I asked. "What are talking about?"

"It's okay, honey. Jake's a good boy. You two have been close ever since you met. I should have known you two were more than just friends."

What?

"Oh, Mom. No!" I said.

"It's alright! Really. I always thought that Jake was a little bit...well...'you know'. But hey, I understand, he's cute. I think it's sweet. And if you guys ever want to go upstairs and make out, or whatever. I'm cool with that."

"Mom!"

"But the door stays open, and your clothes stay on. I don't want you two thinking that you can just..."

"Mom! Stop! Please! I'm not in love with Jake. This has nothing to do with Jake. I swear." I said.

"You can tell me, you know? You don't have to keep it a secret. I know how to keep my mouth shut."

"Believe me, Mom, if I had the good fortune of having Jake Marshall as my boyfriend, I'd run through the streets naked, shouting it out to anyone who would listen." I told her, gently rolling my eyes. "This situation is a bit more 'complicated' than that."

"Do you wanna talk about it?"

"I wish I could. I just haven't figured anything out enough to talk about it yet. I just need some time to think."

She nodded, and then pulled my head toward her to give me a kiss on the top of my head. She started to walk to the dining room when she heard me snicker quietly to myself. She peeked back around to see what I was laughing at.

"What?" She asked confused.

"Did you really think Jake was gay?" I snickered, and she smiled with a soft blush in her cheeks.

"I didn't say that."

"Well, you implied it."

"I didn't...what I said was...I thought you were going to your room to 'think'." She chuckled.

"I'm going to go to my room and think about you letting me and Jake 'make out' on my bed.” I said, laughing as I ran upstairs before she could throw something at me.

While a normal school week would slowly glide by like a ten ton glacier in the Atlantic, the first few days of this particular week zoomed by in minutes. It jumped from Sunday to Wednesday so fast that I couldn't even blink without losing a few hours. I attempted to keep a mask of total calm on my face, even though I was literally hysterical on the inside, not knowing what the hell I was going to do about this coming weekend. What's even worse, every day that I came home from school, Adam’s phone number was staring at me angrily from my desktop. Hounding me. Haunting me. Silently nagging me to call him already and get it over with. And then, after chickening out completely, I tried to go back the next day and pretend to be normal again. But trying to hold this panic down in the pit of my stomach without letting it show was about as difficult as trying to hold down an angry cat in the bathtub without getting wet. I don't think I've ever been this stressed out over some cute boy before. What am I doing to myself? Am I going nuts or what?

Summer and Jake made sure to remind me every single day that they were going back to the cafe. They even said that they might even make a weekly habit out of it. Just for the 'four' of us. But I didn't give in. I never once let them think that I was actually gonna 'show up' on Saturday. Even when they pushed, even when they teased. I didn't care. I already made a big fool out of myself last time, and if I screw up a second time, he's just gonna write me off as an idiot.

You know, you would think that this kinda thing would get so much easier when you were out of the closet and actually found another gay boy to talk to. You would think that having all the signals in your favor and actually being somewhat infatuated with a gorgeous dream boy who supposedly likes you too would be a gay teens ultimate fantasy come true. But, the truth is, I don't think I've ever been more scared of anything before in my life. This was like, 'Armageddon' to me. I didn't know what to do, what to say, how to dress. I could hardly tell left from right in his presence. How in the name of Christ am I supposed to appeal to a boy who's so....so....immaculate. It wasn't so much that he was unspeakably beautiful, or that he had a wit and charm that melted your heart within ten seconds of being around him, or that he has inspired every heart bursting mind blowing emotional orgasm that I've had since the second he came to sit at our table this past weekend. All of that was intimidating, sure, but more than anything I found it alluring.

It was the fact that I just wasn't. I wasn't any of those things! At all! How the hell am I going to be 'enough' to keep him even mildly entertained? It's like having God himself tell you that it's up to you to save the entire planet from certain destruction. I mean, what would make anybody think that I had the brains or the power to do that? I just...I'm not sure that I can ever be anything other than a total fuck up in his eyes. And frankly, to even dream that I could live up to his expectations the way he's already exceeded mine...well, it's preposterous.

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I find it absolutely funny that Tyler thinks he's not good looking. Don't worry, Tyler is far from ugly. I mean, not super-model gorgeous but defiantly not ugly. xD

Sorry this chapter is short. And Adam-less. This was really just a filter chapter.

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The Set Up *~BoyxBoy Romance~*Where stories live. Discover now