I'd Never Expected

Chapter 5

We walked for several feet in silence. They only audible noise was the rain pounding against our umbrellas and the passing cars.

I couldn't take it anymore. I had to say something. "So… How are you?" Ugh, there I go again with these lame questions.

He shrugged.

We stayed quiet again. Damn it, did he literally mean what he asked? Just walk to school together and that's it?

I was about to speak again when he interrupted.

"Listen, about how I behaved yesterday…"

This was more like it. "Nah, don't worry about it." I had a feeling that he would bring this up but I've already forgiven him at that moment on the porch earlier. Let bygones be bygones.

"Hmm.." was all he said as if accepting it.

We fell silent again. Okay, now it was beginning to feel a little awkward.

Suddenly he turned to me and became really serious. "Do you really want to be my friend?"

That caught me off guard. "Uh.. Yeah."

He turned his head straight again and frowned, almost as if he was disappointed. "As much as I appreciate that you minded me so much, I don't think we should be friends."

"Say what?" No way he's still trying to distance himself. Was this walk only an excuse to politely turn my friendship down? I really didn't know why I expected different. I thought I had gotten to him yesterday. I'm so naïve.

"It's nothing personal, it's just… I'm not a nice person, you know that, and I have my reasons…"

I looked at him hoping he would maybe just tell me those reasons.

"But I can't tell you," he finished.

My face fell. Yeah, I should have known.

"You said you wanted to get to know me better and I'm guessing that's the reason why you began talking to me these past couple of mornings, despite what I thought before, but, I think it's best that you don't have anything to so with me. I'm sorry." He looked down at his shoes and spoke again. "You're a good person. Caring for others and such, but.. You should be more concerned on other better people. Don't waste your time on me… I'm serious."

I nodded and still couldn't help but ask, "Could any of these reasons have anything to do with your past delinquency or your father in that case?" Those were the conclusions I could come up with since that conversation I had with Mr. Eister two days ago.

"Yes," he said.

"Oh," was my reply. Was he suffering because of his father?

We didn't speak the rest of the way to school. It didn't seem like neither of us had anything more to say. I understood his request and left him alone.

A week passed and it went on like before. He pulled up that shield and I kept away.

On Thursday Vita came over for a visit. We went to my room to do our homework. It didn't take her too long to start mentioning Ronnie.

"Wow, you were serious. He really won't come out at all," she commented as she realized he hadn't made any serious attempt to exit his room.

I pursed my lips. "Yeah," was all I said. I didn't want to add to that.

I went back to my homework but I couldn't help but feel Vita eye me carefully. I didn't like it when she did that. It made me nervous, mostly because that was usually a sign of suspicion. I slowly turned my head to her.