Breathe Again

Persistence

(Bella's POV)

It was three in the morning and I was wide awake.

How did I get here? I'd moved to Forks expecting repetition and boredom. What I'd gotten was vampires and werewolves and more close-calls than I wanted to think about. Why couldn't I be a normal teenager? Everyone else my age was concerned with classes and grades and getting dates to the prom. I was more worried about death by monster and feeling like my heart was being ripped out. This could not be normal.

I wasn't nearly as afraid of the nightmares as I was of laying in bed for hours thinking about all my mistakes. For the second time in my life, I sought the help of cough syrup to wipe away my consciousness.

I was in the meadow, again, but it was pitch dark except for moonlight, and I was completely alone. The outlining forest buzzed with life and I could hear someone-or something-circling me just inside the trees. I slowly turned in circles, trying to glimpse it. Was it Edward? Was it Victoria?

I could feel its eyes on me, lots of eyes. Then I heard a low snarl. Twigs cracked and leaves rustled closer and closer to me. I spun wildly, my eyes straining against the darkness, trying to determine where it was, which direction I should run from. Then I saw them.

Eyes reflected in the moonlight, and they were approaching me from all sides. Something-several somethings-were stalking me and I was surrounded. The snarl became a low growl, then...laughter?

There was no screaming this time. Instead, tears were spilling onto my pillow.

"Bella? Bells, honey, wake up."

I could barely move my eyelids, so I just groaned and rolled away from the voice, pulling my pillow over my head.

"Bella!" I was being shaken. "Bells, please talk to me," the voice pleaded.

Jacob? What was he doing in my room, kneeling over my bed? And where was all the light coming from? And why were my eyelids so heavy? Oh yeah, cough syrup. Well, it was certainly doing its job.

"Go away," I mumbled.

"Not until you talk to me."

"No," I said into the pillow.

"Last night...when I saw you kissing him..."

"I didn't kiss him. He attacked me."

"I know."

"I'm done with boys. They're all stupid."

"You kissed me, Bella," he whispered.

"You're stupid, too." I was really starting to appreciate the effects of cough syrup.

"You liked kissing me, Bells."

Okay, it was time to wake up now. "And you turned it into...into...something obscene!"

"That's crazy, Bella," he snarled. "I didn't-I wasn't-what the hell are you talking about?"

I sat straight up, glaring at him while the room spun a little. What was in that cough syrup? "You said you loved me. I trusted you, Jacob! I trusted you!" I shrieked hysterically. I threw the quilt back and scurried out of bed. Never mind the tears. I was too angry to care that I was crying-again.

In a flash he rose up to his full height and crushed me to his chest. I pushed against him, but it was fruitless. It didn't help that the floor was swaying or that I was sobbing uncontrollably.

"Bella, please," he begged. "Don't cry, honey. I'm sorry. Tell me how to fix this."

"Leave," I sobbed, trying to push him away. He didn't budge. "I won't be taken advantage of. Go find someone else to...to feel up!"