Falling For The Good Girl

Chapter 30- Overthinking Has Destroyed Me

Luke's POV
I wanted to cry but I couldn't. I was in shock. My brother is never coming back and it is Layla's fault. I know it's her fault because I followed them outside and I saw the fight go down.

"Look what you've done!" Liam shouts angrily at Layla as tears stream down her face.

"I know! I feel awful! I should go after her-"

"I think you've done enough, I'll go" I spat angrily while walking passed them. Blake isn't even moving, he's just sitting there looking at the street, and Liam is pissed.

I know exactly where Ivy is going. She's going to the park, the one place where she feels safe and secure. I run to the park and I see her swinging on a swing.

"Ivy" she turns around with tears in her eyes but hasn't said a word. "Ivy please talk to me" I say with tears in my eyes. No response. I sniffle.

"Fine. If you won't talk then I will and you are going to listen. I have thought ever since mom died that I had done something wrong. I felt guilt when she died. The only reason I am telling you this is because I know that you felt guilty too. I know you thought that moms death was your fault and Zander too, and I can sense that you feel that what happened tonight is your fault but it's not. You have to quit overthinking because look at what it's done to me! Overthinking has destroyed me, I get into fights constantly, I cry myself to sleep at night and I get like you and act like everything is okay when it's not! Ivy we can't keep blaming ourselves for accidents-"

"I have to blame myself! I could have been a better daughter and mom would still be alive! If I would have been a better girlfriend then maybe Zander would be alive, and if I didn't run after him and call his damn name to make him look at me then Aiden would still be alive too! ALL OF IT IS MY FAULT AND I JUST WANT THE WORLD TO STOP MURDERING ME INSIDE!" She screams with tears in her eyes. She holds a sharp twig to her wrist.

"Ivy stop-"

"I keep thinking that everything is going to get better, but then the universe has different plans for me! Maybe if I just ended it then everything would be better" I shake my head.

"Ivy you don't mean that-"

"The burden is on me Luke don't you get it! It's the only way!" She cries and tears stream down my face.

"Ivy please. I lost mom and Aiden, I can't lose you too" This gets her to stop. She puts down the twig and starts pulling at her hair and screaming.

"I can't! Make the pain stop! It hurts!" She screams as tears stream down her face. I run over to her and cradle her as we cry together. My phone rings and I pick it up as she continues to cry. "Hello?"

"Luke where are you? Are you okay? Blake and Liam told me that Ivy ran off-"

"She's with me dad. I'm going to take her home soon and we can all grieve as a family"

"Alright, come quick Mason, Sabrina, Maria and I just got home" I nod even though he can't see me.

"Okay, we will be home soon" I hang up and hug Ivy again. "Ivy we need to get up, dad wants us home" she shakes her head

"I can't go back there"

"Yes you can Ivy. Remember what you said two months ago? We are going to get through this together as a family, so no matter what you are feeling right now, we can help you. Just come home with me and we can work all of this out" She nods slowly and weakly gets up.
Ivy's POV
When Luke and I got back to the house, everyone kept looking at me so I did what I do best, I ran upstairs and slid into a corner of my room.

A few minutes later, Maria comes into my room clapping. "Wow, all this happened and you still find a way to make it all about you"

"I'm not making it about me-"

"But you blame yourself. And maybe you should, I mean my brother's death was your fault. He killed himself because of you. Your mother was in the car because of you. And now Aiden got hit by a car because of you-"

"You don't know what happened!" She crosses her arms

"Really? I don't. What I do know is that people keep dying and-"

"That's not my fault! All these years I have blamed myself for things that I didn't even do! I've had health issues and mental issues and that's all because of me. You have no right to come in here and tell me what is my fault! I hate that everyone keeps dying and I don't want to keep losing people but that's the universe and it hates me! But you... You have no right coming in here and telling me what the hell I did! Get out" she chuckles.

"I don't think I will-"

"GET OUT! GET OUT GET OUT GET OUT! GET OUT OF MY ROOM!" I scream at the top of my lungs as tears fall down my face. Dad and Sabrina come running into my room.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Sabrina spits at Maria.

"I'm just giving her a taste of what she deserves-"

"Alright that's enough. Get out, we will deal with you later" Dad shouts angrily at Maria causing her to jump and run out. "Let me talk to her" Sabrina says referring to me and dad nods and walks out. She comes over to me and bends down.

"Sweetie, don't listen to Maria-"

"How can I not? She's right. It's my fault, everything is my fault"

"No Ivy it's not. I know you feel like it is but it's not" I shake my head and cry harder.

"They are all dead and it's my fault. I killed them. It's all my fault-"

"No it's not. They were all accidents. Your mom death was an accident. Zander's death was an accident. And Aiden's death was an accident. None of it was your fault, you are not the villain. Nothing is your fault stop blaming yourself" she starts crying causing me to cry harder.

She hugs me, then gets up and closes the door. "I don't know what to do anymore, she keeps blaming herself" dad cries.

"Maybe we should take her to see someone" Sabrina replies.

"If that is what it takes to make her stop blaming herself-"

"Listen to the two of you! Will you listen to yourselves? Sending her off to talk to therapists is not going to help. You need to be there for her, you can't just tell her to stop and walk away because what will that make you? It will make you a coward" A voice that I recognize as Mason's scolds. He opens my door and without a word sits next to me. I hug him and we spent the rest of the night crying.

Everything is my fault.

It always will be.

And that's not going to change.

Ever.
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Hey guys, what do you think? What do you think was wrong with Blake in the last chapter? What do you think is going to happen next? Comment what you think and don't forget to vote, thanks
-Jen