"Years gone by
And here we lie
You're like my star
We've come so far"
It wasn't years, I think. But there were months. Months of stalking you, and then months of talking to you, until we could finally meet.
Your smile was I magical, I must say, that was one of the first things I noticed. Bright as a star.
And meeting was an accomplishment I couldn't believe that was possible.
"Will you lay here?
With me my dear
When the sky
Is not so clear"
Eighteen years. Of being alone. Not completely alone, but lonely. Not having someone I could really trust.
Having no one to really talk to was hard.
But then I found you, thank God I found you.
"You hold me in your arms and I hold you back
and when the dark sky fades to black
My tired eyes are blinded
By the fairy lights."
That hug on the first PINOF really changed us. It confirmed our love.
And I remember the light of a lamp on your bedside table after we fucked, not exactly fairy lights, but I was still blinded.
Blinded by your beauty, you laying next to me, with your arm wrapped around me.
"How far would I've gotten
without you here
but times been forgotten
for years and years."
I really wonder how many years would I had lasted without you in my depression. Maybe four or five, until I would realise that my life was meaningless.
But those times, alone, with just my uneasy mind with me. They all disappeared when I fell for you.
Those moments died in order to remember you.
"My life is begging to piece together with you"
And in the moment you kissed me I knew, that you weren't a new addition to my life. You became a part of me. Essential, like a heart or a brain.
"I could've made it on my own
But you were like my stepping stones
I'm looking forward to 2022
With you"
Of courses I could've done it. I could've done everything. I could've been a lawyer, a YouTuber, an damn astronaut.
But for being a Youtuber, you were like a path, a path to follow.
And 2022. I don't know, I had a good feeling about that year.
"One day
We will be brave
I'll tell the world
I feel this way"
A while passed, three or four years. And we still felt the same. And of course, with millions of fangirls. They had noticed something. Long stares, smirks and smiles.
But I couldn't tell them. I just couldn't.
"But I look up
And wonder why
They need to know
How our life goes"
Of course, I understood the love of our fangirls for us. But I never understood the hardcore, stalker fangirls.
If they wanted the truth, they wouldn't get it by pressuring to define my sexuality.
"You hold me in your arms and I hold you back
and when the dark sky fades to black
My tired eyes are blinded
By the fairy lights."
Now casual hugs and kisses were common. Everyday. A simple act that could make millions of people go insane.
And the fairy lights of my bedroom now blinded me when I awoke to your beautiful face next to me.
"How far would I've gotten
without you here
but times been forgotten
for years and years."
By then, if we had any intention in separating our channels- which we hadn't have because fuck, we couldn't even separate after a kiss- was impossible. Because it wasn't Danisnotonfire or AmazingPhil.
It was Dan and Phil. But of course, as friends.
Every peck, make out or even near fucking could be cut out, and scrapped from our fans forever.
And I love you Phil, even if I don't on camera.
