Hope ~S.M.~

Leaving

It was 2 am and I looked around the room at all the broken things. Shawn finally fell asleep a few minutes ago.
This was my chance to sneak out and leave.

I grabbed my suitcase before quickly and quietly leaving the room, making sure not to wake Shawn.

I was able to get a taxi to the airport.

I checked in my bag and walked around the airport for a while waiting for 5 am to come.

Before I knew it, it was five o'clock and my plane was boarding.

I sat in my window seat looking at my reflection through the window. My face was bruised, my busted lip was starting to scab up and close, my nose wasn't bleeding but it was still very sore and bruised kinda like my eye, ribs and stomach.

I'm leaving Shawn. This is something I thought I would never do. He's helped me get through a lot. He brought me everything I ever wanted or needed without me having to even ask him. At first he treated me like a princess but everything changed when he started headlining his own shows.

I guess it was because he was so stressed over stupid things but even when he was off tour and writing music he was stressed about the song being perfect and I get that too. But what I didn't get is why he would hit me when things didn't go his way, like it was my fault things didn't go his way.

The entire flight my mind was filled with so many thoughts of Shawn. Making me confused, scared, unhappy and a little bit of relieved.

Confused on why all this was happening to me. Confused on why he had to abuse Me in the first place. Confused on where I would go and what I would do after two weeks when I told Gerty I'll leave.

Scared because he might find me. Scared he will find me and hurt me.

Unhappy because I'm leaving the only person I've ever loved.

Relieved because I'm away from the abuse.

***

I finally landed in JFK where I met up with Andrew. Once I saw him I ran to him and jumped into his arms and cried. "Shhh Jas... it will all be okay." He said trying to sooth me.

"Andrew it's over between us." I whispered and he nodded as if he already knew.

I got off of Andrew and he looked at me. "You said he didn't hit you." Andrew frowned examining my face. I looked at the floor and sighed.

"I didn't want to worry you because I've never called you once after he hit me and if I would've called you you would've been really worried." I said holding back the tears.

"Well... Should I be worried?" He asked and I slowly nodded my head. "Last night was really bad." I said and Andrew nodded his head understandingly.

"I'll get your bags." Andrew said going to baggage claim and looking at the luggage to find mine. After a few minutes he came back with my bags and we left.

On the drive to Andrew's apartment he made me explain everything that happened. I even told him about Shawn cheating on me.

He could've cheated on me with anyone. He would always text people and say that he was working with them on something but he could've been cheating on me with any one of those people. I have always trusted him enough to think he wasn't cheating. I never went through his messages because I'm not like other girls who don't trust their boyfriends.

I sighed and looked out the window while Andrew went on and on about how I shouldn't go back to Shawn.