Don't touch me.
Because the last time I let someone's hand press against my skin
It was wrong
Not the forced or invasive type of intrusion
But the molestation of my soul.
I said it was love
Because the movies and books taught me
That when it's real you fight
And that you curse the day you met
That there's always gonna be bad times and you need to just press through them.
They didnt tell me that I'd be down on the ground
Out of strength and out of breath.
My voice weak from all the yelling
My hands shaking from all the anxiety.
They did not tell me I'd cry
About the way trust can just vanish.
That a friend can become the reason you no longer trust anyone.
I was not told that I'd feel this way.
That after five years and three months
One small slip up
Would shatter a heart
Even though it'd never been dropped before.
I was not told that I'd be picturing him
Around every corner
That when I go to our once most favorite spot
His shadow would be lingering there
Waiting for me
To remind me that love does not only come in good versions
But also in ones that can tear a person apart
Leaving them broken and hopeless
Leaving them tired and in peices
So please,
Do not touch me
Because love has not been kind
And until further notice,
This heart is out of service.
