The Diary of a Teenage Psychopath #Wattys2016 #Completed

Chapter 5 - Pot and Jealousy

Dear Simon,

I know it has been decades since I wrote to you, but things have just been going so incredibly well. The week flew by and I have only gotten closer to my new friends. It's Saturday morning at 2 and I have so much to tell you. Everyone is asleep now and Mom doesn't know that I'm even home. You think Mothers would stay up and check if you're ok. Not mine.

Before I tell you why I am up at this ungodly hour, I must tell you how my week was. Scarlet and I have been hanging out more and more. I skipped two classes this week, something I have never done before, but only because Scar wanted to show me the most amazing view in Sunset Park. It's called Sunset Park for a reason. We went there in broad daylight but there was still a sort of orange ambiance, glowing in a partitioned part of the place. I was so stunned I didn't know what to say. We went there on Wednesday during the middle of school. But I felt bad about cutting the whole time and I think Scar sensed it.

After Wednesday, she wouldn't let me go again until school was over Thursday. This time we brought snacks and stayed until sunset. Scarlet brought something of her own. Something I promised myself I would never even touch.

Pot.

I know drugs are bad and even you told me many times to stay away from them, but Scar said if I tried and hated it, then I would never have to do it again. I don't know what the big deal about it is, aside from feeling beyond amazing, it did nothing to me. I was high; I came down, then carried on with life. I thought I was going to hallucinate or something.

I actually like Pot. It feels odd writing that. I've never been taken to such a heavenly place. That first draw, calms me so much. The release is better. The smoke looks pretty coming out of my mouth and nose. The smell is intoxicating. The high is addicting.

The lightness in my head was welcomed. Scar seemed to be a natural. Her eyes got glossy and slightly droopy but she was still so beautiful. "I wish I were as pretty as you." I remember saying.

She had looked at me and smiled. "But you are, Hedy."

I shook my head and began laughing like it was the funniest thing, anyone had ever said to me. She looked at me and began laughing herself. Then we just sat there, our backs pressed against the cemented partition, laughing at an untold joke. It was the happiest thing, Simon. I don't know why people say it's so bad for you, I actually felt smarter than I ever have. I could remember formulas I learned in AP Physics, sophomore year. Scarlet thinks I'm some kind of genius, but she is actually smart herself. She skips class half the time, but when she goes she participates, makes up the homework and still aces the tests. The teachers think she has some kind of disease so they haven't been questioning her much. That and they all probably have a little crush on her.

We sit with the guys every day at lunch. They have been having their little hang outs after school too. Until today's lunch. I got my tray and headed for their table, as usual. Then all of a sudden I feel a tug on my shirt. My tray wobbles and by the time I turn around in the crowded lunch room, I see Lincolns black sweater, walking towards the cafeteria door. I put my tray down, tell the others I have to use the bathroom, and follow him.

By the time we are outside in the empty hallway, he has a childlike smile on his face.

"Hey?" I said. I could feel my face blushing already. I had no idea what he wanted, but we were alone, and that nervous feeling in my stomach was present again.

"Hi." He said. His lips formed in to a pout and I couldn't help but giggle.

"What's wrong?" I asked, like a mother would.