I Am His

Trust Me

I woke up and headed to the tour bus. Today was my first day at work and I knew I'd need to learn everything I needed to know so that Lou could trust me and leave me the job. I changed into simple comfortable clothes and made my way to my mirror. I looked different, a nice different, for a long time I had not seen my face with any purple hits. I smiled and went with no makeup; it's not an everyday thing for me not being able to use it.

"So I did get to teach you their makeup, just something fair remember" Lou said to me making me nod in agreement. "I'll teach you the hair so come with me so we can work on it."

I headed to the small station she had and worked with the boys one by one. I learned how each one had their own style. It wasn't difficult. I did warn her that I probably would not be able to give them haircuts to which she laughed and said she would do that when she was by. I didn't do much this time. Lou wanted me to see, she said I'd do tomorrow's work.

I was sitting on a minding my own business when I felt the couch sink on to my right side. I turned to see Harry smiling at me.

"Learned something?" I nodded to his question and looked at my hands.

"Is there any way I can have an actual conversation with you?"

I didn't answer.

"Look Olivia, I can see something bothers you, it's not hard to see, matter of fact everyone sees it. You need to toughen up and talk to someone. You are weak and... unhappy. I don't know what it is but you've got the whole people working here talking about you. Do you not like working with us?"

I could feel myself get teary, everyone could see it. If everyone could see it couldn't they see that I wasn't fine, that I needed help, and that I need strength? Maybe I could trust him, but if I said anything and Matt wasn't better yet, I'd be basically asking for my death wish. I just don't know what to do anymore.

Tears fell from my eyes. They came down one after the other. Harry came closer to me and before he could wrap his arms around me I denied him access.

"Please don't" Matt wouldn't have liked it.

"What's wrong, you can tell me."

"I want to call Matt."

I heard him sigh before he handed me his phone. I dialed his number cleaning my tears.

"Hello."

"Matt" my voice was groggy and he would probably tell I was crying.

"Hey what's wrong, what did they do? Did they hurt you?" Hurt me? That question coming from him, I want to laugh, no one has ever hurt me as him.

"No, I just I want to see you."

"Olivia, you know I can't. I've signed up for therapy already, I start in two days. Do you think you can have some money by then?"

"Really? Yes I'll send you some."

"Trust me on this Olivia, I will get better."

"I trust you."

We said our goodbyes and hanged up. I handed Harry, who was still by my side, his phone.

"If you missed your boyfriend you could've just said that." He stood up and left.

I don't miss him, I should but I don't. I don't know what to do.

I stayed in my seat gathering myself.

"Did you like Ireland?"

I turned to find Niall on my other side.

"It is lovely."

"Now you've got to see Paris and we'll see who was right."

"I do want to see Paris."

"You will."

"When do we go?"

"About two weeks, if I am right then it is about two weeks."

The boys went to preform not so long ago. Seeing them interact with the fans made my heart swell up. They cared for them, cared for every single one of them.

***

I took the role now as the boy's hair and makeup stylist, Lou was still with us she was, this time, watching me instead of her doing it for the boys. Niall kept joking around with me making everything take more time. Liam and Louis were both nice about and helping me if I got anything wrong. When Harry sat down he didn't speak, but his eyes were on me all the time. "Do you like it?" I asked about his finished look.

"Yeah. Olivia can you trust me?"

I looked him straight in the eye and wondered where this was coming from.

"I had to go through some stuff I wish I hadn't when I was young. My parents were going through a separation and I was afraid. I didn't want them to. I was scared. I figured things wouldn't be the same anymore. When they did separate I was devastated. I was quiet, weak, and sad. I thought that would be everything I would be. I hated seeing my mum sad. But she met someone else. She married and they are now happy. I am happy now; I figured that if things don't work the world may give you a second chance. I realized that my father is still my father and that my mum is still my mum and that my mum's husband is now part of my life as well. Sometimes we feel at our worst but good things always come out of them. What I am trying to say is that whatever you are going through will get better, trust me."

I watched him stand up and leave leaving me confused. I quickly followed him and called him making him turn. "Why do you tell me this?"

"Because I trust you and I hope that one day you can trust me enough to open up about what it is that bothers you so much. Don't be scared to talk."

The thing Harry is that I am Matt's and Matt doesn't let me talk about it.