If I Leave This World (~Harry Styles~)

Chapter 3

Once my mother left for work, I was once again left alone in the colorless hospital room. I pulled out my phone to text my best friend, Delaina Allen. I met Delaina in the hospital when I was first diagnosed with leukemia. She and I shared the same diagnosis, right down to the chances of survival; 75%. I like to consider myself as a fighter, but Delaina was something else. I don't even think she cried when she lost her hair. She faces her challenges with a smile each and every day, and if it wasn't for her positive influence in my life, I don't think I would have fought as hard as I have. We have been through so much together, and she is closer to me than anyone in the world. Call us cheesy, but we are soul sisters, and we are sure of it.

"I'm sooo bored D:" I texted her lazily. Delaina has been in and out of the hospital for a few years now, as was I. She was released to go home after her last chemo treatment about a month ago; the doctor's said that they felt really good about the effects that the procedure will have on her health. When she didn't respond, I found myself bored again, so I decided to listen to some music. I popped my earphones into my ears and turned my iPod on shuffle. The first song that came on was "I Wish" by One Direction. I smiled to myself. I really liked One Direction. I wasn't a crazy fangirl or anything but I was certainly a fan of them and their music. I closed my eyes and enjoyed their voices in my head.

I Wish.

I was vaguely reminded for a second of my wish that I have ceased to make. You know, I thought to myself, I should probably wish for something. After all, the opportunity to get anything that you want, anything in the whole wide world, doesn't come along to just anybody, right? I tucked the thought in the back of my head, reminding myself to talk to Delaina about it later. I wonder what I should wish for.....

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I woke up at 3:30 in the afternoon to Delaina walking into my room. When the had I fallen asleep? The last thing I remembered was turning on some music and relaxing while the meds from that morning kicked in.

"Laney!" I said groggily as I slowly sat up. Whatever medications Julie had given me this morning had definitely worn off. I softly grunted in pain as my back seared with white hot agony. I put a frail hand on my pounding head. Ugh. Cancer really sucks sometimes. I placed a pillow behind my back and opened my arms for my best friend, who was approaching me for a hug. She gave me a gentle squeeze, probably assuming I was in pain. She wasn't wearing a wig today and I could visibly see black hair beginning to grow back on her head. When she saw me eyeing it, her smile grew.

"Your hair! It's growing back!" I was so excited for her.

"I know, I'm literally so excited! I woke up this morning and looked in the mirror..." I listened as my friend dove into her wonderful story of her realizing that her hair was finally growing back after months and months of baldness. I couldn't help but feel a twinge of jealousy. I wanted so badly for my hair to grow back. I wished I could go out in public proudly strutting my bald head, but I just don't have that kind of confidence. No one except Delaina, my mother, and my doctors have seen me without a wig, and I intend to keep it that way.

"So, how are you Payton?" Delaina eventually asked with a serious look growing on her face.

"My back hurts like hell," I complained, not even bothering to hide it anymore.

"Do you want me to call for a nurse or something?" she asked with concern evident in her voice.

"No, it's okay; Julie gave me a ton of meds this morning and I don't want to have too much in my system. As you can see, I've been passed out for most of the day." I laughed a little bit, before remembering my thought this morning.

"Oh!" I perked up a bit, pain shooting through my back. I winced and continued, "Delaina! I meant to ask you, what did you... wish for again? You know, from the Make A Wish Foundation?"

My friend rolled her eyes. "Ugh, don't even remind me. I chose to go to DISNEY WORLD. Like, are you kidding me? That's only what every other kid on the planet wishes for. I hate myself." She said jokingly. "You haven't used yours yet though, right? It should be something totally awesome."

"That's what I was thinking about this morning, actually." I stated.

"What made you think of it?"

"It's kind of weird, actually," I began. "I was sitting in bed listening to music this morning and the song 'I Wish' by One Direction came on. I dunno, the thought just kinda popped in my head I guess."

"Ugh, I love them," Delaina said. "Matthew can't stand that I like them but I mean, come on, just LOOK at them!" She exclaimed. Matthew was Delaina's boyfriend, and she loved joking to him about her love for the boy band. Suddenly her eyes grew wide.

"Oh my God, Payton. You should use your wish to go to their concert! Like, with a VIP pass so you can meet them and everything!"

"Laney, you know I can't go to huge events like that," I said kindly. I was currently recovering from a chemo treatment that I had about a week ago, and I would be having another one in two weeks. The side effects it has on me are pretty bad, and I find myself cooped up in the hospital for months, suffering from fevers, nausea, migranes, vomiting...you name it.

"Oh come on, you're such a wimp," my friend said jokingly. Of course, she was kidding. If there was anyone who understood what I was going through in this world, it was Delaina Allen. I stuck my tongue out at her playfully, and she rolled her eyes.

"You should at least MEET them. That would be so flippin' awesome, Pay."

"Yeah, but they have SO many fans. I doubt that they would be able to visit ME, some sick teenage girl, in their spare time. At least, not all of them at once." To be honest, I hadn't even thought about the possibility of meeting them until Delaina mentioned it. I had to admit, it would be pretty cool.

"Well, who's your favorite?"

"Uh.... probably Harry," I played with my nails.

"Then why not wish to meet Harry Styles?! It may not happen, but hey, you never know...."

"I don't know, Delaina," my heart was racing. Meeting Harry Styles would be out of this world.

"Well, just think about it. Not every girl in the world has to opportunity to do something like this, so as your best friend, I would advise you to really consider it and if it's something you want to do. Yolo, right?"

"Oh my God, shut up. Literally never say that again." I punched her arm lightly and laughed.

"Oh, be quiet you. Listen, I have to go pick up my brother from soccer, but PLEASE think about what you'll wish for. I love you girly." She bent down and gave me a light squeeze.

"Love you too, Laney. I'll text you tomorrow. Thanks for visiting me." I smiled at my friend, and she waved and jokingly blew me a kiss before leaving my room, abandoning me in the company of only my thoughts. I was extremely tired again, even though I have pretty much slept the day away. I wished I could just be a normal teenager who did fun things with her friends, had a boyfriend and didn't sleep her days away.

Not wanting to depress myself any further, I turned off the lights in my room, turned on my music, and fell asleep.