Looking for mercy

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What's the meaning of happiness and where can I find it? I've been looking for it all around but without avail and I really need some help so would you help me please? anybody? Anyone?
It's been so long since I was happy or since my heart was happy and I did my best to make it feel that way again but I couldn't do it, where should I start? and what should I do? Obviously too many questions left without answers..
I could easily get lost and I'm losing my soul piece by piece with everyday passes on, I'm compressed and confused even though I've got nothing to worry about, in the fact I feel that there's something missing in my life, kinda weird I know!
Maybe it's all because I've got no close friends anymore or maybe it's all because I turned my back on the God for too long and he's punching me for that, *hope he's not*
When I was a little kid I used to be close and near to my God but unfortunately I'm not nowadays, I can't remember when it was the last time I took the Quran to read some pages of it and I can't remember when it was the last time I cried while I'm praying, I swear things were better when I was young indeed I'm not looking for happiness, I'm looking for mercy and the grace of God.

Don't forget to vote & comment guys

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