Stuck in Ana's world

Introdction

Introducing myself I find is difficult because I don't really know myself at all. For starters I live with my dad and my younger sibling in a fairly old house in the country side, me and my mother never really saw eye to eye therefore I don't have much to do with her but my dad certainly makes up for a whole two parents as it is. He basically works constantly so I only see him at nights and on weekends but I'm use to looking after myself as it is. I would say I'm almost the mother figure in my own life as I have had to figure out most of the womanly things in life on my own, which I must admit hasn't been the easiest. I still attend high school sadly but atleast it passes time and keeps me busy. Music is my escape along with many beneficial substances and prescribed medicines along the way, I guess anything to take away the idea of reality keeps me entertained. Weed is my top remedy to passing through the day as I myself would not be without it. I guess in a way it keeps me sane and able to do day to day things such as sleeping, eating, socialising and assuring I'm mentally stable. I guess you could say I have an addictive personality of sort I do come from a family of alcoholism, gambling, drug issues but let's not go into that. Although the best way to take a step out of reality is LSD that drug can keep me happier than my prescribed medication and it sure has a better effect. It opened me up to the unknown and before taking that drug I would say I was pretty naive towards reality as a whole. The way I see it as people we don't really know anything and to assume you do is quite idiotic because who really understands what happens when we die nobody has come back to tell the tale and the purpose of life is unknown to us due to that so to live life knowing you know nothing is an intelligent trait to have. Now you may be thinking I have quite cynical views I didn't always use to be this way around last year I'd be giving away $100 of dollars to people I barely knew due to how overly kind I was until one day I came to realise about everyone in my life spent most of there time with there hands in front of my face for things and I was basically the human equivalent to a door mat so I guess you could say that made an impact as to who I am now. When I was a few years younger I had high hopes for attending university and actually going somewhere in life that all took a blur in year 11 one day as I was discussing with my career advisor my future plans ahead and was basically told someone like myself wasn't capable of achieving such a high thing such as university and at that point my attendance and mood was already all over the place so from the day forward I guess I became a lot more realistic about my future as a whole. I think the only reason I still choose to be alive is the few people I have in my life who mean only the world to me, let me begin with Gypsy my absolute partner in crime and my favourite person to experiment narcotics with her family are like my second family she has dark long hair, perfectly defined cheek bones, fairly tall and slim and is a beautiful individual inside and out and although we don't attend school together I'm fortunate enough to see her often and she's the only friend I have actually in near distance to me. Luke is another close friend of mine he would have to be my only friend I actually connect mind to mind with as he seems to actually understand and relate to me more than anybody I've ever come across he has quite dark hair, fairly symmetrical face, slight facial hair, tall, fairly appealing features to say the least he's a genuinely wonderful person though and I'll always appreciate him. Lastly there's Angel her name fits her description as she is the sweetest individual I've come across although she's overly apologetic I enjoy being around her more than I do with plenty of other individuals, she has short blonde hair that barely reach her shoulders, piercing hazel eyes, quite short, very slim and overall she has one of the best personalities I've seen in a human.