It's been a week since Phil and I told his family about our relationship. At first, everything seemed fine, but now Phil is acting strange. He's not as happy and energetic as he usually is and he's been distancing himself from me. I don't know what's up with him, but it's strange and I'm worried about him.
I was sitting on the couch watching Harry Potter when Phil came out of his room. He was walking slow and he had bags under his eyes, as if he stayed up all night. "Morning." I said. All he did was give me a glance and a little nod.
What was up with him? I decided to confront him about it, I got up and walked over to him. I grabbed his shoulder and turned him around and his eyes got big, like a hamster about to get killed. (I'm not sorry) "Phil what the hell his wrong? Why don't you talk to me?" I asked. All he did was shake his head, as tears built up in his eyes. We stared at each other for a few minutes, not saying anything. Until I reached forward and grabbed him, wrapping him in a tight hug.
"Please Phil, tell me what's wrong. I love you so much and I don't want to lose you." I whispered, tears running down my face now. Still all he did was shake his head and continued crying into my shoulder.
We stayed there for what seemed like forever until my phone started to ring. "I'll be right back." I said, as I walked into the other room.
I pulled out my phone and answered it, not even bothering to see who it is. "Hello?"
"Hey Phil." My eyes got wide and I stood there for a second before responding.
"Um.. Hi" I said. Who the fuck was this guy?
"So, where are we going for that date Saturday?" I froze.
My vision went blurry as tears filled my eyes. "Who is this?" I asked, voice shaking from anger.
"It's Ryan, you know, the guy you met at the bar the other night. You asked me out on a date. Do you not remember?" I was ready to throw my phone at the wall. How did he get my number anyways? Did Phil give it to him? Was this his way of breaking up with me?
"Um I think you have the wrong number. This is Dan Howell, Phil's boyfriend. At least... That's what I thought." My voice cracked and I broke down into tears.
"Oh.. Sorry.. I'll just um- I'll just go then." And with that, he hung up.
Phil ran in after he heard me crying. "What's wrong?" He asked. I looked at him feeling nothing but anger grow inside of me. Finally, I got up off the floor.
"WHY PHIL? WHAT DO YOU THINK IS WRONG? YOU'RE FUCKING CHEATING ON ME. IS THIS WHY YOU'VE BEEN SO QUIET LATELY? AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH?" I yelled. I was pacing around the room as I yelled, I grabbed my curly hair and pulled at it. "I love you Phil, but I guess you don't feel the same." I walked out and slammed the door behind me. I needed to get out of here.
I heard him calling my name, but I didn't turn around. I just continued running. I didn't know where I was going, but as long as it wasn't where he was, I was fine with it.
"Dan please stop! I'm sorry just let me explain!" I turned around and shook my head.
"No. It's over." I turned away from him and walked towards nowhere.
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I found myself walking to a cliff, the wind blowing strong as I climbed over the gate. I sat down on the edge, breathing in the fresh air. I felt... Free. But deep inside I knew that I was alone. I didn't have friends, I didn't have family that accepted me, and I didn't have Phil. I didn't have anything. I looked down over the side of the cliff and saw the river at the bottom. It calmed me down enough that I could release my grip on the metal bars of the rusted gate.
My phone buzzed in my pocket. When I looked at it, I saw Phil's name and threw my phone off the cliff. I can't do this. I can't deal with him right now. I need to take my mind off things. I got up and climbed back over the gate. I was softly humming Bohemian Rhapsody as I slowly walked down the gravel path that lead to the cliff. As I was walking, I noticed a bunny hopping beside me. A smile was on my face as I bent over and stroked the furry creature softly.
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-time skip to next week-
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I was curled up in a ball in a bed that wasn't mine. Tears were soaking my face, hair, and clothes. Why? Why did this have to happen to me?
I miss him.
I miss him so much.
But he's gone.
