Adopted by PTX

Chapter 9

"Ugh." I moan from my pounding headache as I wake up. "I wonder is I could just cut of my head to make it stop?" I ask myself out loud. After a minute of trying to think about what had happened I finally remembered. "Oh no no no no no no no no no. I did NOT. Oh crap. I'mma be grounded for life!" I say to myself letting my head fall back on my pillow jerking back up as my head begins to hurt again. "Ok right at this very moment I don't really care if they see me so I'm going to get pain killers." I walk downstairs to where of course they are.

"Alissa!" Scott says loudly.

"SHHHHHH." I scold. He gets very aggravated by the shhing and lectures me. Of course I ignore him and continue to try and find the painkillers.

"And you-"

"Shut up and just help me find the dang painkillers before I die from my brain jumping out of my head." I tell him cutting him off in mid sentence. "You know what? Never mind because you'll just end up continuing." I say walking back to my room.

"Painkillers painkillers painkillers... UGH where the heck are they?!" I say frustrated. "If you can't kill pain you create more to take it away." I say picking up my razor. I only make one cut before it starts burning like fire. "Ow!" I Yelp.

"Alissa! Get your butt out here!"

"Can't, ah, right now." I say gripping my wrist from the pain mid sentence.

"Why not?!"

"Just. Cause." I say pausing cause of the pain.

"Alissa!" Scott yells again. Aggravated I open the door to where he can't see my wrist.

"What?" I ask. He's red in the face and has that vain popping out of his forehead showing that he's mad.

"Don't snap at me!" He says.

"Too..." I stop. I look at my wrist and grab it. "Bad." I finish.

"What'd you do now?"

"Nothing, where are the painkillers?"

"In my hand." I snatch them out of his hand and run into my bathroom. I take them quickly.

"Ok." I breathe. (A/N I know that's not how painkillers work this is just for the story)

"Alissa! What'd you do to your wrist?!" Scott asks snatching my wrist. I Yelp in pain and quickly pull my arm back towards me.

"Nothing ok now just leave me alone!!" I say practically screaming at him by the end. I see someone come up behind him and hold his waist from his side. Mitch. Great. Just great.

"Alissa just calm down." Mitch says.

"No! Have you been under a rock? I have got drunk, gave my virginity to a girl I don't even like because I'm not a lesbian, and have started cutting there is absolutely nothing to be calm about!!" I yell. "And on top of it all Hope is dead as far as I know because she was kidnapped this morning." I mutter. My eyes have become glossy and I try to keep them from letting the tears loose. "There is nothing I can do about it. She's gone I could've helped if I had been there and now she could be gone. Or been raped or committed suicide or or or...." I say now having to try harder to keep tears down. "Or worse. And even stuff I've done I can't do anything about it."

"Alissa."

"No."

"But Alissa."

"I said no! You people you just ugh! You don't understand. You people don't understand because y'all had a perfect little childhood. I mean you found your best friend for life at ten you had loving parents who didn't just leave you you've never liked someone who is a different. Because y'all have a perfect world. I had my best friend killed this morning my parents left me a long time and I love someone a boy who's gay. Not even 0.0000001% perfect world. We all are totally different people in the world. Y'all have the moon and I have mercury. Where everything dies." I say. They both look like deer who's caught in someone's headlights.

"Goodbye!" I say quickly shoving them out. I lock the door and slide down it until I'm sitting on the floor with my knees against my chest.

Wait. I love him and he won't love me.

I break down sobbing because my love won't love me. Especially since he's pregnant by someone else. Why did this have to happen?! I'm done. I'm never letting myself fall for anyone ever again and I'm getting my feelings for Mitch out of me. Because love is too painful.

I'm done.

That was a long chapter so enjoy! Also could someone please tell me where my ideas wanted this chapter to go? Cause I was just writing and haven't read over it but I think it's all over the place so yeah. Bye bye ily.