Cygnus and Christopher

Untitled Part 13

Christopher interrupted my story about this coastal town I once visited with my family. "I've got to stop you. I'm lost. Don't even know what is being compared to what anymore." Being cut off mid story by Christopher felt out of character of him, but I agreed with it. Even I wasn't sure what I tried to get at. "Sorry. To make things simpler. The reunion went really well and my Aunt's house is scary." Christopher nodded. "Much better."

Summer was about halfway done by that point. Grass more brown than green as a result of a dry streak. The sun spent less time in the sky each passing day. Young animals of several varieties hunted or foraged the woods and countryside. Perhaps not unlike Susan, Tomas, Christopher and me.

The four of us lounged in old, worn reclining chairs set up in the woods by Christopher's house. We used to have three, but earlier we found one at the end of somebody's driveway. A red one, free of any large stains, and not too heavy. Still, all of our shoulders turned a shade of red, not much different than the chairs color, while carrying it out to the little outdoor living room.

A basket filled with berries from Susan's garden passed between us. The batch the sweetest of the year, consistent too. No disappointments, each berry offered its own unique and pleasant flavor.

When the berries ran out, Susan and Thomas took a moderate dose of some new drug they ordered online. I declined their offer to partake. A nebulous desire to slow down on psychoactive substances grew within me. Nothing catastrophic had happened, just a feeling that something might happened gnawed at the borders of my beliefs. Christopher also refused the offer. "Not one to mix booze and research chemicals." He did ask for a rain check though.

Susan often got chatty when she came up on anything. Said that conversation helped with the nerves. Her nerves may have been ample. She talked a lot, in long monologues mostly. One statement sparked a chat I still think about sometimes.

"I want five kids someday. Siblings seem like a lot fun." Susan said. Christopher moved his chair from fully reclined to a more upright position, and chimed in. "Five kids would be so much damn work. I want one. Maybe a second one if the first is not an asshole."

Susan furthered her point of view. "I don't see it as work. More of a fun way to help shape what the world will be like. "

Thomas joined the conversation with a little smile directed at Susan. "No big preference for me. I'll likely go with however many who I am with wants. At least one though. Adoption maybe, could-"

"-Oh yeah adoption for at least two or three of my kids I think." Susan agreed.

The air warmed and dampened as the day continued. I thought back to chemistry class in eleventh grade, recalled a diagram in the textbook that demonstrated how molecule speed was positively correlated to temperature. On an experiential level, the opposite felt more true. The day warmed and I slowed.

Thomas and Susan cuddled in one chair. The seat cushion sunk deep. Christopher stood and paced. Discussion about children ramped up for a bit. I stayed out of it for a while, tried to listen well and understand the thoughts of those closest to me. No one asked my thoughts on the matter directly, but the six staring eyes and lengthening gap in conversation did an adequate job of it.

"Well, I have a hard time thinking about it. Like I know almost nothing about it and it is tough to imagine. Sometimes I think about the future and just nothing pops up, and other times all I get is just a stretched out version of my current life. Like things just kind of continuing how they are now for eternity and no one really seeming to notice."

Christopher laughed. "I suppose there is no need to think about it too hard for now. I'll just enjoy this childless summer ya know."

The only response from Susan and Thomas was a nod. Their eyelids barely open. Christopher laughed again, sat down, and drank a large amount from his bottle. Soon all three of them were asleep.

I got sleepy as well just looking at the three of them motionless in the woods, wondering if maybe this scene had already began to stretch towards infinity.