Just Creator Things

About my roleplaying days...

Ha. Wow where do I even start?

I mean it's a good ole' part of my life so I'm just bluh about it and how lame this is but I wanna talk about it.

It means a lot to me and I've been thinking about it for a good while. So here I go:

My roleplaying days when they were an all time high. Were. My best days when I think about it. It was a big part of my life.

Like five years worth of my life put in it and STILL going. ("damn, what a loser" I know, stfu.)

But it helped me out. A  l o t. I had a lot of bad days especially with "friends" I had and no friends I didn't have. I could say I was rather, alone?? though out maybe two or three years of that time.

Yes, I know. There's the "that's bullcrap because you at least socialize with at least SOMEONE during that time." And I did, but there's a difference between friends (1), friends (2), and best friends/Internet best friends, also senpai's.

Friends (1) - I socialize here and there. Talk a little during school, not much or at all on social media. Wave. Smile. Say hi, passing during the halls.

Friends (2) - Talk very much often, has more in common with me, at least talk everyday, +.

Best Friends/Internet - MY FUCKIN BITCHES. 24/7 TALK. LOVE U 5 EVER. DOWN WITH CHU. SLEEP OVERS AND COME OVERS. IN COMMON AF. Also can do real talk with chu at anytime.

Senpais - Oh jeez. Oh jeez. I rarely talk to you but I love tf out of you so much. And jelly. V jelly but good jelly. Ahh ily so much byeeee.

But yeah. I didn't have much of best friends ^^^ during that time, and the time I thought I did. They weren't really they "best".

nOW DONE WITH THAT. But I did have my snazzy good ole' bestie group chat that has lasted about three/four years and that also what got me through all my problems. There was laughs, drama and more and it just gave me a confidence boot. Sadly now, I have contact with them but I'm really just active with only one person out of four in the group chat.

And I'm actually scared if I lose contact with them. It'll be officially over and that fucking sucks. I just really hope I can meet them one day since we're actually very close to one another because they all really mean so much to me.

Along with my roleplaying (rp) account. That's where it literally and officially started, on Instagram. I first was just posting Homestuck pictures. Then taught how to rp. And the rest is hISTORYYYY. I was decent I guess. I wasn't top notch perfect in the characters I rped with. But a lot of people seemed to like it!

I never thought that I would get to 3,000 followers EVER in my life. Even though most were ghost but it was still pretty fuckin cool. And the thing is.. Only ever really on a few rare occasions I would realize the lIKES ON THE PICTURES OF MY ACCOUNT WAS BECAUSE PEOPLE WERE R E ADING MY RPS. AND I NEVER THOUGHT TWICE ABOUT IT. I never thought TWICE about how people were READING IT AND LIKED IT!! So many things that I've done make me just throw a fit that I didn't realize people were reading my rps and liked it. It still makes me giggle and squirm in happiness when I think about it.

My main character I rped the most was, the troll himself, Kankri Vantas. As said before, I was never perfect but I did well. Then soon I started to create more and more friend, learn secrets, do some serious rping and more. It was all fuckin glorious and I loved it!

Eventually through out the years I eventually added. The Signless, Jake English and John Egbert. Never perfect but I ALWAYS loved it!! Now, my account wasn't very clean you could say. Meaning NSFW. Not going into detail but I grew into it. They even got so emotional, I FUCKIN CRIED.

There was also a decent amount of drama along with it too. Admin and rp wise. Rp wise, MMM DANG SON. Just don't have a weak heart. Really. It got sooo real and graphic. We also had our cool, little, perfect rp group and stuff. I guess we were popular, idk.

My top perfection with my roleplaying that still lasts till this day is my Cronkri w/ my closets Internet friend ever.

The Cronkri relationship we have between them is SO fucking strong it's amazing. It's like their an actual couple in rl and it's just SUCH an achievement for me. It means a lot to me too. Five years of them trying to be together and it's just honestly pure love between them. And it's so rich and passionate to me that it's goals. Goals for me. The thing is, they never just jumped into "LETS FUK HAHA" right away (mainly 'cause of cock blocks). But like an actual relationship with drama happening, and it's like a hazy dream to me every time I roleplay with them together with my friend. It was like about four or five official years before they actually got officially together. And I cried. I was so happy. (Really just imagine this as a reunion of Pearl and Rose/your fav OTPc after yEARS of love pinned up like a motherfucker and you'll get my drift.)

Now that. Is my most top achievement in roleplaying and I don't ever want to take it back. As you see. I am very passionate about this. But sad thing is. People grow up. People get less active and people moved on. Since it all eventually ended, it kinda left me empty and I started to post my drawings there instead.

Now for the rest of my roleplaying. I do and don't want to take it back, mainly because.. I wanna go back. And do better.

By go back and do better is be more..active than I was. I was still shy and nervous and I barely tagged people in a roleplay or went to go roleplay with them. I always just waited till someone talked to me. And I really regret it. I let so many opportunities go and I hate myself for it. I could of built better relationships and more but I was shy and didn't. Though, I do love what I've done or what I have done.

I think I was worried and stuff because even if we were cool, I still looked up to them. A lot and I didn't way to disappoint them??? So yeah they were like friends (1) but also senpais. And that just held me back I'm sure. But I wish I didn't.

Also I did have my first girlfriend during that time, but it was all a use. (Shit happens.)

But yeah. My rping days where the best for me and built me into who I am now. I actually want to bring it back into my life more. So that's what I'm gonna try!

This only worked once but. If you are on here and happen to know this, I wasn't popular but. A Wattpad user saw some art I posted on Instagram about my Minestuck story and recognized me! Which I thought was really cool sooo...

My account named was "tumblr.troll" but I changed it to my art account and now it's a different name. Though, that's who I was back then ^^^ I'm actually thinking about changing it back and having it as a roleplay aND art account. Since I miss it so much.

Well, let me know if you recognize it or so. I've missed it for so much that I actually will be posting it on my Insta to show the good news to people who actually like my account still. But yeah.

Uhm, thanks for reading and all now.

See you on the other side!

-psych0