glory and gore ; phan

xiv

the brunette's blood-tinged irises flickered towards the vast array of salmon clouds infusing the hazed, obsidian sky; iridescent locks of glimmering stars peppered across the coalition of grey-overlaid colors. "you know what you said about," he hazily trailed off as he shoved his shivering hands in his tattered pockets, "about why i do what i do."

phil's azure eyes flickered to his left, watching as the brunette dragged his bottom lip in between his chattering teeth. "you were right," he spoke, a dry smile tempting to curve at the corners of his chapped lips. "i was always an," he paused, shaking his head wryly, "angry kid, but after my dad died, i needed something. i had this friend, charlie, and he got me a job as the middleman, so to say, when it came to his drug ring."

the ebony-haired boy's multifaceted irises glinted with a melancholic caution, as if treading slowly through the toxic oceans of dan's howell's mind. "and what does a middleman do?" he spoke under his breath, his ghostly words fading into the clouded oxygen accompanying the bleak frosts of winters in vegas. dan exhaled deeply, keeping his bloodshot gaze locked on the stained cement. "i did what i had to when a deal went wrong," he murmured quietly, chewing on the inside of his cheek until he tasted the unmistakable metallic toxicity float over his tongue.

phil remained silent for a moment, wrenching the sudden tightness of regret-infused anxiety in the brunette's chest, until a wry chuckle voiced from beside him. "so you're telling me you can beat up asshats in a drug syndicate but can't win a fight against the drunk dumbasses from an underground fight club?" dan smirked, meeting his boyfriend's oceanic gaze as their iced fingers tangled together.

"my god, i love you," he laughed, causing phil's glinting grin to falter in the slightest, before returning wider. "and i love you," he smirked, pecking the brunette on his salmon-tinted cheek. dan smiled, before his lips phased to a grim purse as his eyes dimmed in a questioning apprehension. "you know the day you called your dad? about leaving london? you never told me what he said," he inquired quietly; watching the raven-haired boy swallow the despairing pit of secrecy in his throat before forcing a weak smile.

"well, aren't you good at killing romantic moments," he dryly chuckled after a moment of hesitation, the corners of his mouth tilting up forcedly but his eyes coated with a melancholic overlay of torment. "dan, he uh," he stammered, ceasing his paced steps through the mud-tinged sludge as he disconnected their hands. "he didn't," his hoarse voice trailed off, before meeting the worrying toxicity infusing the brunette's blood-tinged irises. "n-nothing, he was fine with it. i mean, i'm an adult, yeah?" he forced a laugh, the muscles forming the falsified grin straining his anxious veins as dan's eyebrows softened in belief. 

"o-okay," the brunette nodded hesitantly, returning his tremulous fingers to the warmth of his boyfriend's palm; ignoring the anxious gulp of falsified words trickling in regret that was forced down the ebony-haired boy's throat.

-
three hours later

the soft snores bleeding out from between his boyfriend's chapped lips caused a weakened smile to sadly tilt the corners of the obsidian-haired boy's mouth as he closed their bedroom door; swallowing down the enclosing gulp of his regrettable status as he picked up his phone. the monotone dialing of the phone seemed to twist the gut-wrenching tightness in his chest, his heart plummeting in a mess of antipathetic anxiety once the agonizingly-familiar voice sounded slyly from the phone.

"yes, lester?" the voice snapped, though phil remained silent as if his strained throat had completely closed up. "i hope you aren't thinking about backing out. after all, howell's damned brother is on a plug, and that plug is in my hands," the voice continued, the raven-haired boy forcing down the tainted abhorrence coating his lips as he began. "i want out," he spoke, attempting to appear much more powerful than he was feeling. "tut, tut, phil. do you really want to be the one responsible when your boyfriend gets the call about his little brother's death?"

"i-" phil cut himself off reluctantly, digging his fingernails into his thigh frustratedly as he pictured the toxic smirk of his employer playing across his murderous lips. "that's what i thought. and by the way, lester, i can't wait forever. get ready to send a knife through his pretty little throat soon."

well ,,