hansol🍭
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I put my phone down, and think about what to do. Why did he text me all of a sudden? I heard my text tone go off again and I jumped from the sound. I grabbed my phone and looked at the other message.
Kidoh: I heard about your little break up. Want me to make you feel better? 😍😉
I lock my phone and stand up. I walk to Xeros room and knock on his door. "It's open." He yells from inside his room. I open the door, and walk to his bed and lay down. "Xero. Some one just texted me and I don't know what to do." Xero got up from the desk and laid next to me on his bed. "You don't have to talk to Byungjoo if you don't want to." He says, playing with my hair. "It wasn't Byungjoo." I say, softly.
I feel him shuffle on the bed and now we're face to face. "Kidoh?"
I nod and try to keep in calm breaths.
He looked confused, but snapped out of his daze when I started sniffing. He looked at me with worry, and laid beside me. He cuddled me into his chest, while whispering sweet thing into ear. "Why am I always crying?"
I ask, in between breathes. "You're just stressed out." Xero says, rubbing my back.
"Are you going to text him back?"
"No, he hurt me so much, and now all of a sudden he wants to come back? It took me months to get over that asshole. He just used me like some whore. I'm sick of him." I gasp for air as I yell this. Xero lets me yell, because he knows it's my way of getting things off my chest.
"Hansol, are you okay?" Xero asks, softly, after a while of silence. I shake my head and begin to silently cry some more. "Byungjoo made out with someone else at a party, I rejected you coldly, and now Kidoh wants to play games again. I can't handle this." I sob out through my tears. "Hey, you didn't coldly reject me. Even if you did, I shouldn't have said those things, while you were so vulnerable."
I wipe my eyes and look up at him. "But you're my best friend, and I didn't even clearly talk to you about your feelings. I just pushed them away, and worried about myself." He looks at me with sad eyes and pushes my hair out of my face. "It's okay to put yourself before others sometimes, Hansol. And it was my mistake confessing to you."
"But I don't wanna break your heart, because I know what that feels like, and it fucking sucks. I don't wanna cause you that pain." I sob even louder, feeling guilty and sad that i'm crushing Xero's heart. I can see that he has tears in his eyes and it only makes my heart hurt even more. I'm hurting my best friend.
"Everyone discovers a heartbreak once in a while. Don't be guilty because you caused mine. I'll get over it, okay? As long as you're my friend, I'm okay."
I shake my head. "I don't want you to feel heartbroken. I love you too much to cause you any pain like that."
Xero lightly chuckled and pulled me into a hug. "You act like i've never been heartbroken before. I'll be okay, Hansol. Okay?" I finally nod and accept it. "I'm sorry." I say, lightly, slowly drifting off to sleep.
"You have no reason to be."
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Breakups hurt really fucking bad, but it's apart of life, and you learn from them.
I recently had one, and I wanted to stay friends with the guy, but he told me he just wanted to be alone. There's nothing I can really do about that, expect accept that he's no longer interested and move on, reluctantly.
Sorry, I don't like telling my friends my problems bc I don't wanna annoy them with my problems. Also, they never fucking listen, so what's the point in telling them. I don't know why i'm telling you guys this. Sorry, about that.
Anyways, on a happier note,
I have a new fanfic out titled "Weed"
It's Vhope/Taeseok.
If you're interested, you should check it out.
Thanks for reading all this shit. I love you guys❤️
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