Hypnophobic. 》Ziam AU

14 ➳ Hypnophobic

Zayn's POV

I woke up to a blinding light and an uncomfortable bed, and an empty room, an unknown room, it registered in my head.

I woke up.

I woke up.

The panic started to register in my head. The heart monitor next to me started beeping like crazy and I looked down to find an IV stuck into my arm. I couldn't see. Who let me fall asleep. Where was Liam. Where was Liam.

"LIAM LIAM!?" I screamed.

A nurse burst through the door. "BP AND HR ARE UP AND HE'S PANICING!" She yelled behind her, but I was to busy ripping the IV from my arm. "Get me a sedattative!" She screamed.

"NO DON'T PUT ME TO SLEEP I NEED TO FIND LIAM HE KNOWS— WHY AM I HERE I JUST NEED—" before I could even finish my sentence there were five more nurses in the room cornering me and then, I was asleep. Again.

➳ ➳ ➳

"You gave him a sedative are you fucking kidding me? Did you even read his medical records? Are you serious?" Liam's voice hissed. "You're lucky I'm not going to sue you, I could press charges for carelessness in medical supplies. I want any nurses who were on this case to be removed immediately and the one who came and told me what happened to be put on the case. And I want to talk to whoever is in charge of you, as well, he's hypnophobic, you can't just put him to sleep, he panics when he wakes up, he needs to obviously be around someone he trusts when he wakes up, he doesn't even know why he's here, why would he be comfortable waking up with some random stranger?"

"Aren't you the one who punched him? That's not very trust worthy." The nurse, I think, said.

Silence.

"I'm so sorry sir that was really unprofessional—" the nurse stuttered.

"Just— just get out— " he sighed, "cause it was kinda funny but it was unprofessional but it was funny so leave before I leave my mind and tell your boss."

Footsteps.

A door closed.

More foot steps.

Someone sitting down by me. Liam I assume.

A sigh. A sad sigh.

A choked sob.

He's crying. I don't know what about. I don't know if he's crying over me or about me. The fact that I'm in this hospital bed or that he has to be here with me. I don't know if some thing is seriously wrong with me or what even happened I can't remember a single thing. Or why I haven't opened my eyes, I'm scared to try, I'm scared if I can't, I'm scared of if I can't, if that sedative was too much and now I'm in a coma. So I just lay there. I don't freak out. I don't panic. I just let him cry. And let my presence comfort him. And his comfort me.

I feel him get into bed with me, moving me carefully to hold me to him so he can lay with me in the small hospital bed. Finally, he gets to a position he's holding me to him, his body still softly shaking with his small sobs, slowly decreasing, getting more and more scarce, clinging to my hospital gown, whispering into my hair, right before I fell asleep for the third time. "I love you too. I hate your stupid fucking guts and you're difficult like all the time," hiccup, "but I love you too. I remember the night you said it when we were drunk. I always remember. Always. Sometimes I wish I didn't. I wish I didn't. God it'd make it easier. But I always remember. I love you too you stupid piece of shit stop making me feel things I hate you."

"I hate you too," I whispered.

"What the fuck you're awake!?" He screeched.

"Shut the fuck up I was actually gonna fall asleep for the first time in my life I felt safe you big oaf you ruined it!" I huffed, shoving his chest as hard as I could, causing him to fall on the floor.

"Ow?" He cried, not even getting up.

I smiled.

I hadn't even opened my eyes yet.

➳ ➳ ➳

"So he's fine then?"

"Yes Louis, I'm fine," I groaned.

"Shut up I'm asking the doctor not you," Louis snapped at me. "Why did he pass out? Is something wrong with him? Why is Liam the only one they would let in here?"

"He specifically asked for Liam when he woke up and we only allowed the one person at the time, and he passed out due to lack of sleep, in his file it said he has hypnophobia," I stiffened at the mention of the word, "are you aware of this?" The doctor said, flipping through a file.

Louis shot me a glance, as if asking permission, and I just avoided his eyes, shrugging it off as if to say I didn't care. We both knew I did.

I looked over to my left to see Liam sleeping in the chair next to me, a blanket wrapped around him and his head tilted backwards. 

My mind drifted back to the conversation.

"Have you tried treatment?" The doctor asked.

"I don't really think that's something to be discussed with me—" Louis said.

"Oh right, I'm terribly sorry, I didn't want to wake his boyfriend and I assumed you and he were close," the doctor muttered, closing the file, and walking over to check some of the machines by my bed.

Boyfriend? They thought Liam was my boyfriend? No. Never.  I don't do boyfriends. I just liked Liam. That was it. And Liam liked me. Maybe a little bit more. Love. We loved each other. But he wasn't my boyfriend. Not even close.

"Right, boyfriend... No I just meant you should ask Zayn himself," Louis said, his eyebrow raised.

"I would, but he seemed a bit... Unstable last time we mentioned his condition... It's in the file..." The doctor said.

I rolled my eyes.

"You're talking about it right in front of me and I'm fine. Last time was like two months after I was diagnosed with it. Obviously I was gonna freak out. Did you even read that far into the case?" I asked.

The doctor huffed but sighed and turned to talk to me. "Very well, Zayn. But most phobia patients do not feel comfortable talking about their phobias, it takes many years of therapy to make even a little progress sometimes, so if you feel uncomfortable, let me know."

I swallowed the lump in my throat and nodded, looking at Liam again, only to find him looking back at me with worried eyes, and before I knew it his hand was in mine, his thumb rubbing circles into the back of my hand in a soothing manner and I was okay.

I nodded again.

And then I told him everything and for the first time in forever I actually felt like I was gonna be okay.

[[ what do you guys think of being able to see how Zayn's mind works as he gets scared and freaks out!? Please vote and comment!! ]]