Reckless. [TMNT 2012]

19. Broken Trust; Evelyn

I can't believe it. Casey Jones is the guy from the party. The same guy that I haven't stopped daydreaming about for almost a month. The guy that I spend day after day longing to see again. At last, he is right in front of me.

    But I can't help being disappointed.

    "I can't believe that you're my Prince Charming," I mumble as I take a seat on the corner of my bed. I look down at my hands, no longer able to view the mask I once held in high regards.

    It's not that I don't like Casey; I am quite entertained by him in general. But knowing that he is the guy I have been dreaming about all along has its let downs. I thought the guy from the party would be able to carry on highly intellectual conversations, or that he would be able to relate with my ambitions of teaching those younger than me. I saw him as my ideal dream guy. However, I was wrong. So very wrong.

    "That I'm your what?" Casey asks as he lifts his mask up. His face is distorted into so much confusion that it's almost comical. And it would be funny, if I wasn't so disturbed.

    "Nothing, never mind," I say quickly. Then I face him with renewed confidence, fueled by silent anger. "Why didn't you inform me that you were the guy from the party?" I demand, trying to remain calm.

    Casey appears offended. "Me? Why didn't you tell me that you were girl from the party?" he returns sharply. Clearly, he isn't one to resist a fight.

    I wrinkle my eyebrows in confusion. "Because I had no idea that you were him," I respond. I don't want to argue with him, but I don't see another choice. Why didn't he tell me the truth?

    "Same goes for me," Casey insists with an edge to his tone. "I didn't know you were her. Not until I noticed that Nyleve spelled backwards is Evelyn!"

    "So you did know it was me," I reply with a stern gaze.

    "No! Well..." Casey temporarily stumbles over his words as he tries to figure out how to respond. "I wasn't sure it was you, because April said it was just a coincidence. And no offense, but I have a duty to believing my best friend! Besides, Nyleve played pranks on kids with me. You flat out said that you'd never do anything like that. You lied!"

    I furrow my thin eyebrows and must stop myself from gritting my teeth. "I lied, but it was necessary. As a tutor, it is inappropriate for me to participate in such foul behavior. Moreover, it is none of a student's business of what their teacher does in their leisure time," I shoot back neutrally, though I am shivering with rage.

    "Then you shouldn't blame me for not confronting you about who you are!" Casey snarls, his brown eyes blazing. "I tried to find out through indirect questions, but you shot me down. So chill out, because it's not my fault you're ashamed of yourself!"

    I almost facepalm. He had the whole thing figured out, and he is telling me that he didn't believe it. And in the process, he is blaming me. How pitiful.

    "You knew the truth," I say blandly. "Yet you kept your identity from me. That's not exactly how I pictured my Prince Charming to be."

    Casey narrows his eyes. "Well, I didn't exactly think Nyleve would turn out to be a boring robot!" he spits.

    Up until now, I have been able to cope. But calling me a robot is crossing the line. How dare he label me so unfairly?

    "I am not a robot!" I snap as my anger takes me over. I never get angry, but his foolish behavior has miraculously provoked it.

    "Yes, you are!" Casey shoots back with his arms in the air. "All you do is study! You don't do anything fun! Not once have I ever heard a story about you doing something fun!"

    For a moment, I almost confess the truth. But I change my words at the last minute, stowing my other thoughts under a rug. "I had fun on Halloween when I was Nyleve!" I return as I curl my fists up.

    "Nyleve is fake! She's imaginary!" Casey growl. "And frankly, I don't know how in the name of hockey pucks you managed to pull her off! You're nothing alike!"

    "I created her, so of course I could be her!" I have never been so irritated. I feel like my head is going to explode. "At least I didn't act all sweet and flirt with you! I didn't get inside your head and make you think about me every second of the day, unlike you! How could you play me like that?"

    Casey talks through gritted teeth. "You seriously think I didn't have the same problem with you? I couldn't even sleep because you were stuck in my head!"

    "You are not pinning this catastrophe on me, Casey Jones!" I retort. "How about that day you were injured? You completely lied to me about that!"

    Casey blinks, caught off-guard. "What are you talking about?"

     "I saw you fighting those creatures!" I exclaim, my voice beginning to crack from so much yelling. "I saw them hurt you! I thought you were going to die! I hoped all night that it hadn't been you fighting them, because I didn't want to believe it." My voice is beginning to drop with my emotions. I don't want to admit it, but having seen him in so much pain bothers me every single day. "And when I saw you the next day, I knew it had been you. I just can't wrap my head around why you would do such a thing. Why would you risk getting yourself killed?"

    Casey's expression softens, but only slightly. "I knew I wasn't going to get killed. You see, I-"

    "No, stop," I turn my gaze back on him so he can see how hurt I am. "You can never guarantee you'll live through something like that. Those creatures were twice your size, Casey!"

    "But I-" Casey starts to explain himself, but I don't want to hear more lies. I just can't take it.

    "But you what? You don't think people care about you enough to stop you?" My voice is quivering, almost as if I'll cry. Of course, I know that won't happen. "I care. And if that's not enough, then you have your family. Are you really too reckless to see that?

    "My family is dead," Casey says before I can halt him again.

    Now it's my turn to be shocked. "What?" I whisper.

    "My family is dead," Casey repeats himself. His eyes are suddenly guarded, as if he isn't allowed to feel any emotions. "My father and sister, the only family I had left, are gone. So to answer your question, I don't think anyone cares about me. Because none of them are alive."

    I fall into a stunned silence. I know his mom isn't around, but he never mentioned the rest of his family to me. I just assumed he still had them.

    "Casey, I didn't-" I start to apologize, but he won't hear it.

    "You'll never understand why I do the things that I do," Casey tells me with a hint of grief in his eyes, but then it hardens into coldness. "It's not logical enough for you."

    I don't have a chance to respond. In two seconds, Casey spins around and marches out of my room. Out of my house.

    And potentially, out of my life.