Play Me Like The Drums {Ashton Irwin/5SOS Fanfic}

Chapter Eighteen

Hi everyone! 

Thank you for bearing with me with no uploads. I have holidays coming up and football season for cheer is over so I have a lot more time now 

I think Im going to make another 5SOS fanfic in the near future so comment what boy you think I should do next :)

Enjoy!

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"Renna." I heard Ashton say behind me, my blood ran cold. I decided to ignore him. 

Before he could say any more it was time for me to order. He kept quiet until the lady at  the register asked if we where on one bill. I opened my mouth to say no but Ashton quickly said yes and grabbed his wallet. After he paid I briskly walked away. 

"Ren." He said again, he followed me. 

'No Ashton." I kept walking, keeping my eyes locked forward. 

"I love it when you say my name." I heard him whisper, so quietly I almost didn't hear. 

I felt the familiar rush of emotions run through me, I couldn't go back to him now. Not after everything. My walls slipped with every word he said, every look he shot me, everything he did. I couldn't help myself but think how his amber curls glinted in the light, how just like his eyes they changed. Sometimes his hair looked brown and other times it looked blonde, and like today, it looked like a mixture. His eyes where the same deep brown, not light brown or hazel. 

These thoughts where destroying me. Ashton was destroying me. 

"Just stop it." I finally said out loud, looking at Ashton. I realized we where in the middle of the mall food court but I didn't care, this had to be said. "This isn't fair. It's not fair me, you putting all this pressure on me and I can't control the feelings anymore. It's not fair to Calum to keep him guessing and me leading him on just to run back to you. And it's not fair to you Ashton. I don't want to play this game so you need to find someone who does, someone who can give you what you want." 

With that out in the open I turned and walked off to where everyone else was sitting. I thought that would lift a load off my chest but it just made my heart feel heavier. 

 I sat in betweenLuke and Michael with Ava on the left side of Luke and Kayla on the right side of Michael. Ashton sat across from Michael. The same tension from the car earlier apparently traveled to here. Ava tried to make conversation but no one could deny the tension, they kept looking at me and then at Ashton. Michael coughed, this was just too awkward. 

"I have to go get a dress for this thing at school so I'll catch up with you guys later." I said and got up. 

It was a lie but I wasn't going to stay at that table. I walked to the bookstore instead of any dress shop, with no idea what I was doing. 

Thirty minutes later I was checking out with a book and a sugar cookie. I still had no idea what I was doing so I headed over to H&M and was raking through the endless racks of clothes. I sighed, I wish I had Calum here to make things more fun. 

I was lying to myself, I didn't wish Calum was here. I wished Ashton was. I wish Ashton wasn't like how he was so we could be together, be happy. I walked out of H&M, my head lowered, looking at the ground. 

I wasn't paying any attention to where I was going and I ended up bumping into some mad.

"I'm sorry." I muttered and kept walking, not even looking at who I bumped. 

"Wait!" The guy called and I turned around to face him. He looked oddly familiar. 

"Do I know you?" I asked.