Trans Man Pros and Cons

Part 19: Personality

Not really any pros or cons necessarily.

Explanation:
Everyone expects you to act a certain way when you tell them you're trans. Kind of the same way people expect gay or lesbian people to act. Usually we end up conforming to this behavior but it's pretty hard for you to stop behaving as you had to before (if you came from a traditional type home.)
Honestly, my mom wouldn't let me near the guys clothing section or toys section when I was younger and I couldn't have any male friends, so once I came out it was a shock knowing I can actually do these things I've wanted to do.
I'm not gonna lie and say it was a 'Oh you're a guy, let's get rid of all of your clothes and get you new ones and let you cut your hair short,' because it really wasn't. It took at least 4 or 5 months before I could get new clothes but I didn't know my sizing so that was a total fuck up. It was about a month later that my stepdad convinced my mom to let me get my hair cut short, and it took a lot of time finding out the style as well. When I went back to school people noticed I was acting more masculine and I was just kinda like 'HA yeah I'm a guy, well nice chatting with ya, gotta zayn.'
It's weird, because they all knew me before I was out and honestly I'm not even gonna lie, I have playerish tendencies that I've had since before I came out. It's more of an emotional thing because I never feel truly connected to anyone and I've never dated another trans person except for once but it was an Internet relationship and he was a vaper, we can all guess what happened there. I think for me I like my idea of love which is pretty much the one where someone is content by themselves first, and until I fit my own personal wants, I don't feel like I have the emotional energy to deal with others in a romantic way seriously. (Plus people my age act like we need our soulmates immediately but at 17 it's unlikely you'll find your forever in that crusty boy down the block.) most other trans people you'll notice having a relationship where they allow the other to treat them as a half and half or like a lesbian, and they will feel bad about it and insecure because they already aren't secure with themselves. It happens a lot, believe it or not. I think it's the whole you attract what you put out thing to be honest.
Most transgender people think they have to drastically change their behavior overnight to be taken seriously, but if you still act like you already did it's easier for you to be accepted because you're being the real you and it doesn't seem like you're putting up a facade. Even cis guys are feminine sometimes, it's not something to be ashamed of. Simply behave normally because at this point in time for most first world people the only opinion that's important is your own.

The end of this chapter though.
-Ty