Chapter 11: Please Don't Tell Mom
Chapter song: Not Strong Enough by Apoctalyptica ft. Brent Smith
Hey guys so normally I don't do these long author notes but I need to get this out and yes it is important so please do read even if you don't care. So I need to tell you I started school as of today August 22 2016. To start this I have to warn you that now that school has started, my updates may take for-fucking-ever. Another thing, mentally I'm having a lot of struggles with friends and school already. I found out my bully from sixth grade, who by the way was the start of my depression, anxiety and suicidal thoughts, goes to my school and is in my French class. When I found this out I had a panic attack and almost started crying in class. Thinking about all of this has really made me mentally unstable so please understand. Thank you so much. (160)
Ricky's POV
I continued to hold her in my arms, for fear that if I let go she would shatter. She was so fragile, and yet no one could see it. She's so confident; always smiling and cracking jokes. Sure it's hard to get her comfortable at first but afterwards she is a ball of love and joy. At least, that's what it looks like. I guess it's safe to say that she is a great example of don't judge a book by its cover. You'd be amazed what's hidden in those pages.
This girl, she reminds me so much of my past. It may not be the same, but she reminds me so much of myself. All of the pain; the amount of tears she sheds for her past is heartbreaking. I don't want to see her breaking. It hurts us all so much to see her breaking like this. I want to save her; more than you could imagine. It's a strong feeling I have... that I need to be the one to save her.
She started twisting in my arms. Finally she yawns, wiggling out of my grip so she can stretch her arms high above her head. I watch her closely, noticing the way her nose crinkles when she yawns; the way she lets out a cute little noise as she stretches. She's too precious.
"Ricky, you're staring again." She looked at me for a second and then giggled.
"Pffft no I wasn't," I could feel my cheeks tint red. "I was just admiring the view." Now it was her turn to blush.
"There's no view to see." With that she hopped up and ran out the door to, what I assume is, the kitchen.
I groaned but then ran after her. By the time I reached the end of the stairs I was out of breath. Jesus I'm out of shape. I walked into the kitchen to see her on the counter digging in a cupboard. I looked at her quizzically, then I realized I forgot that she couldn't reach the top shelf.
I shrugged and went to the front room where Chris and Ghost were playing mortal combat. I sat on the loveseat and waited for Ren to come into the room. I wanted to bring up the whole situation and how we were going to handle it. I know she won't like it but we need to take care of her and the problem. I want her safe, I mean uh... we want her safe! Yeah, we! Heh...
Anyways! Speak of the devil. She came into the front room and sat on the loveseat by me, placing her legs on my lap. That lil butt munch! Oh well, I don't mind it that much. However, I should really bring up the problem at hand... "Ren we-"
"I'm already ahead of you Ricky, we need to talk to your mom about what happened Ren. I don't know how you want me to tell her or if you want to tell her." Chris had interrupted me to finish it off. I mean, he is her uncle so he should tell her.
"No. leave her out of it please. I didn't mean to it was just a stupid mistake I know. I just got emotionally overwhelmed. I'll be okay but Please don't tell her. I don't want her worrying when I'm almost 18 and able to take care of myself." Damn.. I know she is almost 18 and all but I think we should let her mom know what happened.. that isn't my choice though. It's Chris'.
"Renny-" Chris started.
"Chris, please don't I mean it. It won't happen again. I was overwhelmed by PTSD it won't happen again I swear." We both looked at her very hesitantly.
"Fine, but so help me god if something else happens, I'm bringing your mom into this. I don't need her killing me for keeping this away from her. " Fair enough Chris my boy.
"If you feel like doing anything we are here for you Ren. You know that. We all love you half to death and want the best for you." Damn I have a way with words. It's all those books I've been reading lately. Haha kidding I just know what I want to hear is probably what she wants to hear.
"Okay." She looked so bummed out.
"Well... that was awkward can I hop in now and say AND IIIIIIIII WILL ALWAYS LOOOOOOVE YOUUUUUUUU! No I mean it I love you girly and you should come give me hugglez because Ghosty loves giving the hugglez!" We all jumped when Ghost did that because (I refuse to admit it) we all kinda forgot that he was here because damn that guy is silent.
Ren got up and ran to give Ghost a hug. "I love you guys, sorry that you had to see a side of me that has long been forgotten."
With that Ghost and Chris got back to their game; Ren cuddled with Ghost and I took a small cat nap on the couch. I'm glad we fixed that all up because that was stressful. I'll be even more happy when she quits cutting and is finally happy for real.
IM SO FUCKING SORRY I HAVEN'T UPLOADED IN SO LONG!!!! My inspiration level was dead and I was just way too fucking depressed to right anything. Plus... writers block was killing me!! Thank you all so much for still reading this and I'm sorry this wasn't written in my normal style but I needed to upload bad!!! I KEEP SAYING UPLOAD BUT I MEAN UPDATE BECAUSE YEAH!!!! I love you guys be safe stay strong <3
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Every Other Weekend (A Motionless In White Fanfiction)
Fiksi PenggemarRen has quit going to her dads on the weekends. She has cut off communication with him entirely basically. Finally her mom had had enough of her being home all the time. She decided that Ren would be going to be with her Uncle Chris on every other w...
